`

a little bit of,

2012-02-09T08:12:00.000-08:00

constantly having different/new thoughts.

most of the time it's more of the negative things.

so i've read that happy people are dumb? false.

because i'm not so smart. fact proven. ok.

hahaha. if only i can remain that happy like everyday.
people say they get bored and irritated by repetitions. but why do we repeat? that's the point.
tired of it? then it's either you bear with it, or just simply turn off. simple as that.
what happens if you decide to ignore? definitely the protagonist will feel left out. i don't really see what's the point of doing so either.

look at these jokers. seriously. i just left my phone with them for a few minutes and they are capable of doing this. lol. enthu ttml.
everyone wants a change. some prefer living in the past, some prefer their new life. while almost all prefers the better one.
i just don't have anything to add on either. ok time to stop crapping.

peek a boo.

one does not change, it's our perspective of them that changed.

sometimes;

2012-02-01T01:38:00.000-08:00

no matter how pessimistic a person may be, i believe every now and then, they need a little positive words, better still a motivator. although those are just cheap words, but still, it will definitely lighten up their gloomy mood.
i have this point of view. but maybe not everyone will agree with my statement.
but still, i believe everyone needs a little happy crappy talk or encouragements, to keep them going.
i felt like that yesterday, feeling so many contraries. luckily i let it out, and ian was like telling me positive views. this is definitely shocking, because all along i didn't know he was that positive. ahhaha.
well i really do miss some people from 11s22 ): may all of you not flunk in A's! so encouraging isn't it.

i'm currently waiting for this fucker.
he said he will wake up at 1pm. now 5pm alr still haven't reply my sms. dafuq?
and it's an off day for me! (after working for 7 days straight)
but how did i spend it so far?
by rotting at home. seriously, having holidays without your friends is such a torture.
before SOPA took actions, i enjoyed watching GA online. now i can't fucking find it anywhere because they removed megaupload.
and furthermore, the rest of my friends, currently in poly, all are having school, so i can't possibly meet any of them due to their busy schedule, or their pathetically tiring lives.
but by march, i think everyone would be free! haha. can go chalet, go malaysia (if possible).
and yes, quitting my job by march!

so, by march, after quitting my job, i have plans! gonna bleach my hair, maybe highlight with some funky colours as well.
anyway, still haven't got my second piercing ): maybe this sunday whereby i got another off day.
working now seems kind of boring? the only purpose is to kill time. haven't really changed since september huh. kind of find it a chore as well. lol.
also, you can guess which is me in the photo! although there are only 2 possibilities of it being me because they look pretty decent.
oh and yes, jc students started school yesterday! so sad i didn't have a chance to look at my juniors miserable expressions, lol.

having that said. i got into Temasek Polytechnic, Biomedical Science (T27).
i wanted to appeal to either np/sp bms, but my COP didn't meet. so screw it. since TP has accepted me, i'll accept TP as well.
although i can appeal to SP's biotechnology, but i'll be giving it a miss. i don't have the guarantee of doing well in that course, and biomed IS my dream course, so why should i give it up?
so now, i'm kind of looking forward to the orientation camp! i think i've changed? i used to dislike camps, but now i am actually looking forward to it.
moreover, this camp isn't compulsory, unlike jc's orientation camp, it is. lol.
so, good luck to me in TP! the most happening poly i guess. woooooooooooooohoooooooooooo.

i thank myself for making that mistake.

not what i expected,

2012-01-31T06:35:00.000-08:00

i am really starting to freak out. i seriously do not know what to do.
if only life had model answers, answers that cleared every single doubt you had, then we can live without having that very emotion, fear.

can someone please, just clear my doubts?
i really don't want any more regrets.

why do they affect me?

apparently,

2012-01-22T08:41:00.000-08:00

i think pouring out to something dead is kind of useless. everytime after i blog, i don't actually FEEL the burden being lifted off, although i say it does, but actually it doesn't. so why am i still blogging? it's like a total waste of time whereby i am seeking attention by posting crap that makes readers grow interested by reading and maybe going "oh so sad, oh so pitiful, oh serves him right". lol. that's why i didn't private my blog. because these are some things that you can know, but i won't initiate to talk about it unless you ask me about it. so that means i have things i never talk about?
who doesn't? don't try to deny because everyone has secrets. and secrets are not meant to be shared, not spreading it to your curious friends. that way, it won't be a secret.

i'm not gonna stop blogging completely, i'll just blog if i have the mood and time.
but i already find it pointless. too bad.

perceptions do change.

what we call paradise.

2012-01-14T08:39:00.000-08:00

time to talk about my JAE application!
submitted on the first day of application. well. i really really hope to at LEAST get into biomedical science at tp now. this constant paranoia is just a killer. silent killer.
so technically, my choices consists of biomedical science and biotechnology. reason being that only these 2 courses can get me to my ultimate goal, medicine. hehe. i won't change my mind.
so how about yours? actually i don't really care.

jpsae. because i didn't have enough points for sp/np bms, i wanted to try jpsae. i read this online but nic told me just apply. ok. i rushed out my portfolio, even though the next day i had to work. when i wanted to submit, "you are not an eligible applicant" because i didn't sit for 2011 O levels.
sigh. if everything really don't go as expected, i'll just have to appeal. and hopefully my portfolio will come in handy.
please please please let me get into my first 3 choices ):
heard so many facts about the jae thing. if i really get into biotech instead. i really don't know how to face myself.

so far, i find working at sentosa great! it's been a very positive experience for me! although sometimes bitter, but i admit it was my fault. like doing unnecessary refunds and stuffs like that. but! people there are FRIENDLY. seems like i'm the most quiet one there. LOL. force me to talk and i'll try.
comparing this, and last year, my f&b work experience can really suck balls.

crazy shit. my cny plus own shopping. hopefully i can claim back at least $100. hehe.
money is always the constant worry. without it, we can't do much.
sigh.
most of my friends are at least attached once. i'm so sad and jealous.
and jae is also another worry for now. i really want the results to out asap. i want to know whether i get to go into my desired course or not!
BE HAPPY, OK.

i can't wait to get into dragonboat/kayak/canoe this year. plus point, can get tanner as well.
i'm so gonna push myself damn hard this 3 coming years. DETERMINATION PLEASE STAY.

renewal of faith and luck.

here's to 2011.

2012-01-07T06:10:00.000-08:00

here's a proper post for the year 2011, the final memories all recollected and ready to be shared. it may not be as awesome as yours, but it indeed brought me back so many memories that are worth to remember, some even for life.
one of the BEST BEST moments of my life yet, i drew blood from another person! i was super nervous at that point of time, but, it was so so so damn worth it. i felt, like a sense of achievement. i actually did something medical. o m g.
felt partially scared, like what if i screw up? what if i inserted the needle at the wrong angle?
yes. everyone will have this uncertainties in life, the negative side. but i did it. i successfully drew blood out from th! awesome moment max. she's lucky she was able to keep her own blood, but i couldn't ): because she failed to draw mine.

one of the saddest thing in 2011, is that i lack of independence. if i didn't depend so much on th, i would have been able to watch an actual surgery. well, cannot blame th also, because she was not very interested in that area. ahhhh! really regretted not mustering the courage to approach the gen surgery team. lesson learnt then. must MUST be independent, and seize any chance if there is any. really, once you experienced that mistake, it's much more easier to actually change that flaw of yours.
seeing my not so close friend posting on fb that he actually got to watch a surgery, for stitching and cleaning up an open wound of a patient who recently got an amputation of a leg. i seriously am fucking jealous of him. i have never ever seen anything so raw like that before right before my very eyes. sigh. i hope i'll get a chance in my internship during final year in poly.

another of the optimistic side, is that i've discovered new friends from jjc, and learnt to cherish my friends from bmss as well. without them, i think i'll just be another loner walking by the streets. although some of them have a not so pleasant characteristics, but it's just them. you'll get the hang of it once in a while.
for the jc side, i really miss those times where we'll literally bitch about every teacher we see, having dirty talks, haters gonna hate, and lepaking in pe lessons(this only applies to me and ian though). i'm glad 11s22 peeps have made it through half way. another last lap for your A's people! you can do it la. all mug tgt with FRM can alr. provided the frm still have their frm spirits...
for the sec sch side, i really appreciate those who made the effort to actually meet up, regardless of tired or what. although some like to pangseh last min, i think you're not putting enough efforts. kind of selfish too. did you ever think how tired i was too? jc life isn't very slack you know. anyway, the best things in life are for us to discover, so break that comfort zone of yours people! let's go ubin and camp. lol.
for the work side, really thankful that yf, sh, brian and aaron happened to work there. without them, i think i would have quitted less than a month. why? because we talk a lot of crap. and that kills lot's of time, therefore making time pass faster. you know ios, it's damn quiet and really really can get very boring as well. so lucky me.

the negative part? hmmmmm. having wasted a year. yes a year, because i quitted jc half way. kind of remorseful for not listening to my parents that time, but take it as a lesson learnt. so somehow, can say it's a half positive half negative thing that happened.
there are certain things that we don't have the need to elaborate. if i say no, i mean it.
and then, the part where..... my hard earned money is being used by my mom. kind of sad, but it's alright. can't account for all these year's pocket money she gave to me. it's like i owe her a lifetime. so in future, if you wanna have kids, don't have them because they're cute. have them only if you have the ability to support them for almost their whole life ok.

okay. so that's it. because the rest of my memories are deteriorating. i couldn't remember the rest. partially stm is to blame though.
so, i've made my decisions on the poly and courses i want. i'm just awfully waiting for 9th jan. others receiving their o's results. while i, am going to apply online. SHALL TRY TO BE THE FIRST HAHAHA. although it doesn't make any difference, but just wanna apply early. so i can actually put my mind at half ease. the other half will be in suspense until like end of jan, whereby the postings are sent via smses! oh, i really hope i can get into my 2nd choice.. hahah. kind of impossible though.
and please, false hopes like " can one la, you so smart" doesn't work on me. in my mind, i'm just replying with "k". not really giving a fuck. sad.

starting all over afresh. i can do it.

leave it all to fate.

2012-01-05T07:55:00.000-08:00

went to sp's open house today. the lecturers really answered some of my questions. so now, i think i have a rough gauge of my decisions. i really need luck for the cop to remain the same this year. please remain at 10 ): really. i want it.
and the much anticipated, freebies. lame. the part i was looking forward to was the asking of questions. the admission part was depressing. this kind uncle told me that during the appeal period, only if your score is within the cop, then you can be able to appeal for that course. so, sp bms, we don't have fate..

woah. a bagu bag? what can you expect from singapore's oldest poly! seriously. i want to get in to biotech in sp as well. really. it's gonna be my 3rd choice. so please, let me get into this course. last year's cop was 10. so i REALLY need luck, that it will remain status quo. if it does, then i'm safe! it's so so so so so nerve wrecking. i can't stop fretting over this. i got this gut feeling that it will rise to 9.. but, hell no. i want to get into sp! it's the nearest poly can.. travelling to school and back home, wasting 2 hours of your life daily, isn't a cool thing. i've experienced this shit for a year, so i really hope it won't happen again.
as for the cca part, i've decided to go for sports! fuck, need to juggle both cca and grades. seriously a challenge. but necessary to prove that you're worth it. sigh.

what's inside the goodie bag! seriously, this year's gifts are much better compared to last year's...
anyway. wanna know what cca i'm interested in? WATER SPORTS. i wanna try kayak or maybe even dragonboat. must be thinking: "sure cannot last long inside the cca one". i think so too.
but, i'll try to excel for it. sigh, tough life i'm gonna have.
this year's motto: perfection. i'll try to make everything perfect this year. let's go, G.O, let's go!

ew wtf. thanks ah nic. for doing this. lol.
what if,
i couldn't get in my first 5 choices? then it would be biotech in nyp/tp alr. omg. that's damn sad. please don't let that happen ):
see, i'm being paranoid already. thanks to the dark future that no one can foresee.
okay. enough! sit back and relax dude.

luck and fate, you're playing my game now.

crash kart.

2012-01-03T06:58:00.000-08:00

i'm so disappointed with my O level results last year.

but what can i do? nothing.

the point is, we have to move on with life. be it happy or sad. time waits for no man.

i'm just afraid, that i'll not even get in to tp. you might say it's unnecessary worry, but to me, the paranoia is there. have you ever wasted one year of your life? i'm glad i've chose this route to actually muster up the courage to go with what i want. what i really am desperate for. so. even if i fail to get into sp/np. i have backup plans. i'll go for interviews during the appeal period. hopefully they'll see the hope in me. LOL. ok, if my appeal fails, then so be it. fate.

now the problem is, i'm contemplating whether to even put rp as my choice or not. just look at reality. nobody sees things my way. nobody is another me. rp is deemed as a looked down poly. so what if i don't think that way? the society does. fuck society.

just like eating monkey's brains? lol. da fuck is wrong with these people.

but don't you want to know how does one's brain tastes like? doesn't curiosity ever struck you?

the world is just cold. our humanity will freeze one day.

the problem is, do we want our humanity to freeze?

i really pray hard that luck sticks with me and nic for this whole of january. i think he needs it more though.
really very nervous for 9th january. whereby i can FINALLY apply via jae for a poly.
then, comes the results, roughly around 27-29 jan. those are the days where i'll really need luck. PLEASE LET IT COME TRUE!

you'll know how i feel if you have dreams, not naive ones, but one you will really commit for your whole life. hardcore for me, but totally worth it.

yes, i'll start with nobody, but i'll definitely end with some.
SO, I'M READY FOR 2012.
hit me with all you've got.

stronger by a year.

indicators.

2011-12-31T22:28:00.000-08:00

yesterday was not really my day; i thought working on new years eve was bad enough already, but seems like 31st december 2011 was a rough one for me.

firstly, my iphone pms and fucking got to this restore page all of a sudden. ok no panic. because i FACE this EVERY SINGLE DAY. and after just leaving it off for like 10 mins everything will be fine. restore page gone, working fine. but yesterday, it stayed on the restore page no matter how long i off-ed it. so it's like, i couldn't get any insights from the social networks and have to spend my day without my phone. no new year's text, no receiving my replies from last night. totally none.

ok, secondly, my 2011 ending was like damn ....

why? thanks to MY, she asked me to go collect stocks from oscar, ok can. then while carrying these 2 heavy boxes, just nice the fucking clock struck 12. everybody, ok mostly banglas, were like rushing in/out from the narrow route the police people built for people to walk through. there. my 2011 ended being squeezed by fucking banglas. FUCKING BANGLAS. KANINA LA.

2012 started with full of vulgarities. me and cg were like scolding all the way. damn pissed as well.

so is this an indicator for the year 2012 for me? i sense things are gonna be rough. hopefully i have enough determination to strive for perfection this year.

2012 HUAT AH.

my first christmas present in 2011! got this even before my xmas exchange. hahaha. slowly guess what it is.

2011 was a year, full of shit, regrets, a slight tinge of worthiness and somewhat a fruitful experience for me. given a chance, i wouldn't want to relive 2011. imagine going through bullshit for another year. no thanks. they keep saying " next year will be better ". no. you are the one who controls this game. if you want your year to be bad, simply just make it bad. if you want it to be a good year, you have the choice to make it a good year. distractions and all are just bullshit. shows how incompetent you are in the society as well.

so, 2012. i hope you will just be good, don't pms and ruin my year. i am so desperate to achieve my dream. i really am. so ready for this 3 years.

just a simple reminder to myself. this is how bad my acne is. hope my $203 is well spent.

march is so gonna be a happening year! oh and i'm planning to quit my job at maybe first week of march? i don't have the time to waste anymore.

malaysia trip, and a chalet, on separate days. yay. malaysia, lowell is coming over. embrace yourselves. and i hope i don't get stabbed by random fuckers on the streets there. i'll stab you back too.

so many worries. i'm really afraid that i can't get into TP BMS too. their cop is 11, and their intake for 2011 was 55. so i'm really scared that their cop will jump to 9 and that's it. le sigh.

i saw this damn cool tattoo while working yesterday. this guy had this tattoo on half of his body, the shape was like a shirt, just that it was half. the design i couldn't really catch but his tattoo is fucking nice. i would get one like that too. but i think tattoos require a really good decision making. it looks nice, but it's gonna be there with you forever. but still, i would get it lol.

also saw this guy who got a piercing on his back of his neck. so fucking cool also.

and also got another guy got nipple piercings. i think that's kind of cool too.

so, introducing foreign objects to your biological body, sometimes makes it look better. really. i think those piercings and tattoo are a form of art and beauty.

lol and i witnessed a fight there too. and many drunkards. some of them like fucking pathetic. like wanna vomit but no vomit yet, so just stone there while their friends keep stroking their back lolol. pathetic max.

since i'm turning 18 this year, let's party for new year's eve as well ok? save up and just go wild.

just don't get too drunk like those pathetic peeps ok. CONTROL is the keyword.

da fuck. time really flies. i'm already turning 18 this year. so fucking fast.

good luck to those taking O's / A's this year. i'm so sad. dropped out from the plans me and my best friend made. hope he graduates and gets into uni! even though you don't stay 5 floors below my house now, we won't fall behind. relationships aren't that easy to break.

actually it is, come to think of it. couples just say " let's break" and really break, i think either party isn't putting in enough effort for the other. and thus they break.

new year's resolution? i'll try to flirt more ok. like that i easier find stead and can understand your problems.

what goes around, comes around; karma.

what do we mean?

2011-12-27T07:38:00.000-08:00

had a wonderful, and well spent monday with my clique peeps. really, felicia didn't turn up. and i really am disappointed. even mary gave up her DSLR for us. yet you? sigh. MAYBE you had a very valid reason for not participating, but you could at least tell us right? it's not like we will blame you if you didn't come, due to reasons. but if you didn't want to come, then that's the problem. do you not take us as your clique? if so, then please don't say you wanna attend to others in the first place. just at least say MAYBE attending. it's alright. just, disappointed.

the only 3 guys that attended. thanks to everyone who put in the effort to actually come for this event! really really appreciated it.
must be wondering, where did we had this christmas exchange party?
actual plan was at marina barrage. but then nic said that the weather on iphone's weather forecast predicted that it will rain on that day, so we changed the venue to vivocity instead, because the skypark there has shelter so if it rains we still can hold this event.
food brought? i brought none. guilty max. but i bought the mats and utensils ok.
fried beehoon w/ egg and chicken - nic
randomly cooked tomato sauce pasta - mary
fruit salad - xw
drinks - evan
camera people - jiamin and me!
eat eat eat. fat sia ):
did many many things there. games, etc. the forfeit was a little too easy going. i'd rather people knock it down 10. lol.
felt like a one day chalet there! without the chalet itself, and alcohol ):
so very looking forward to march's chalet! SEE. we plan so ahead already!
AND the genting trip! faster confirm leh.

the gifts everyone bought in the end! HAHAHA. a little spoiler ah, but coooool max. i think the musical box is the most stupid gift ever here LOL. pardon me for being so blunt.
really, off days are so minimal. i really want to go out and have fun, hang out, and spend money during my holidays. but money is the limiting factor. so that's why my off days are so limited. i want to maximise my working days for $$. realistic, but sad.
truth is, i really don't want to work on new year's eve. i wanna spend it with my friends, ending 2011 with my clique, starting an exultant 2012.
but, another side of me is telling me to act with responsibilities. i already gave my supervisor my word, without knowing that i have to do overnight la -.- but still counted as i gave him my word.
so, i think i'll work still. reality is like this. we can't have what we want ALWAYS. it really depends on us to work it out, compromise. accommodate, and do the changes ourselves.
ending this post with all the cool people's pic.

2011 ended abruptly, but it has almost come to an end. so, 2012, please be a better year for me;
because i'm ready to suffer, and i'm ready to hope.

rag doll

2011-12-24T05:53:00.000-08:00

sometimes, you people give me insecurities. you say you can make it, all of the sudden laziness took over your soul, and then you just don't even bother to notify others.
i'm always telling myself, why do you guys deserve to be treated well by me? is it because you were the people who stood by my side just for the sake of sticking? or is it because you were the people who gave me a little brightness to the dark side?
i really am doubting my trust in some of you guys. i've already bought a gift for the xmas exchange, problem is, do some of you deserve it? it's not that i've bought something expensive or what, but i made my presents unique for each and everyone of you. if you took me for granted, then you can just tell me. please do not let me believe stupidly that you're still one of the better ones.
for example, the gift requirement is >$10. so if i buy a $10 slipper and give it, i still meet that criteria right?
fuck your mentality. it really depends on how much you think your clique is worth your money. i think, those who actually buy CHEAP things really sees their clique lowly. if you are not even willing to spend just a sum of money ONCE in a year, then why bother? if you were close with your clique, would you buy something in a slip shot manner? no right?
see. this is the insecurities some of you gave me. there's only some i really feel steady with, some on the verge of falling.

pardon me for being so pessimistic. well, don't you feel the same way with some people too?
anyways, it really sucks to see other families celebrating xmas eve, and here i am alone at home after work.
jealous, but tired of being jealous. so what if i'm jealous? does it make me feel better? no.
got that gloomy mood, because nobody is going to countdown with me for xmas. and new year's eve i can't countdown with friends either. great. what a nice way to end 2011. full of regrets.
yes, i must say 2011 was a year full of regrets for me. i'm not going to deny this fact. hard cold memories, are going to serve as a reminder to me, for everything i do.
wasting a year is really a sinful thing to do. i feel, incapable. stupid. dumb.
everyone makes mistakes. yes. but there is always a tinge of remorsefulness. there will never be perfect lives. but what could i have done....

indeed, 2011 is coming to a halt. like a speed train suddenly braking, leaving many to die. people flying out of the train, having their skulls crushed, and all the other kinds of death they could experience.
i think in life, it's really too short. really.
see how much i wanted 2011 to pass? it came true. 2012 is at my doorstep already.
really don't want to repeat another mistake next year. try not to, or better still, no mistakes at all.

here's wishing to you, a very, merry christmas.
and a not so sad new year.

feelings can be cured. time cannot be bought.

graved in

2011-12-23T07:49:00.000-08:00

Christmas is almost here. did you get your presents already? did you prepare all the seasonings that you need to whip up some delicious dishes to share with for dinner? did you decorated your house already?
Christmas is just round the corner. but why don't i feel the Christmas spirit around me? is it because i haven't found you yet, that's why nobody lightens up my life? harping on it is really useless, time itself will reveal you. no, actually not time alone. i need to be initiative, independent and confident.

although Singapore doesn't snow, but we do feel coldness here, due to the rainy season we face instead.
but i can feel a little warmth from the date 26th December. because i think it's gonna be a well spent day with my clique. been so long since we actually went out as a whole group already! be it doing stupid or fun things! time is always the bitch, because we had to really find one day where everyone will be free.
i've bought my gift for the xmas exchange alr! did DIY things for them also. fuck it, i spent so much effort doing those DIY things. you'd better give me something good.

these past few days, 21-23 i had my off days. so, i literally drained myself during these few days. because my off days were so limited, that even months of holidays made it seemed like my holidays were only a month instead.
in total, i went to bugis, tampines, serangoon and chinatown. bought stuffs to do the DIY, but failed to buy apparels because i couldn't find really nice ones. and my budget was like $10 wtf. obviously can't find. today i really liked a tee shirt, but it was like $39. so.... maybe not yet. i'll only spend more after getting my pay ): and it was supposed to be for my laptop...
and my dream of owning a canon cam came back. fuck it. i know i won't have the time for it, but i still wanna get it. DAMN.

saw this amazingly attractive voodoo doll. awesome.
luckily nic was like damn easy going. accompanying me these 3 days. 5 years ok.
reality check. i heard my schedule for new year's eve is 3pm-8am? what the fuckery. 17 hours straight? damn.kinda suck. but it's alright. can use this pay for $21.90 and $52.
26th, please don't rain!

fallen angel, can you be my eyesight?

comfort zone

2011-12-21T08:10:00.001-08:00

always wondering what other's comfort zones are.

mine? i think my comfort zone is being with my close friends. i even take some of them to be my best friends already.

we all behave differently in front of different people, fact. why? because we want to be presentable to strangers, we want to be sociable to friends, we want to be crazy with close friends, we want to be ourselves with best friends.

no i don't have 7 best friends, but i definitely have at least seven close friends.

although i am not very sociable, at least i've got some great friends.

i really must say, i don't like going for such outings with friends whom i hardly talk to. yes, the beginning will be like this, but i'd rather we know each other more first, then we continue to the next level of friendship. i dislike friendly people, seriously. i don't like how cheerful they can be. it's like they are stealing away all of our happiness. i don't like very sociable people. those who got no time for you, because they have to entertain every fucking so called friends they have. like 897847898749874 friends.

yes, i may be blunt, but i never liked lying.

yesterday went out with this chiobu on a date ^^

it was kinda boring, but still, a date.

didn't kiss or do anything, just chatted anything under the sun.

after that we went for dessert. then the couple evan and chin mei came extra, seriously lor -.-

we can go clubbing next year leh. don't play play.

but yesterday we eat until 12+ ):

fuck sia i needed to cab home. from abc market to my house, $6.45.

ma de. so expensive.

i also don't like taking cabs. always feel giddy during the cab ride and feel like puking. but whenever i'm on my father's car i don't have motion sickness. so, i think my 8 characters with taxis clashes.

then today went out with this shuai ge.

went bugis and played jubeat LOL. no life.

but, talked a lot crap also. uttering nonsensical statements almost the whole day. oi, proud or not, i take you as my best friend leh. serious.

epic moment today. nic's hand was like itchy. so i gave him hand sanitizers. after nic bua his whole hand alr, he exclaimed that it was fucking pain. so i gave him a tissue. LOL-ed la. i accidentally caused his blisters to come in contact with alcohol.... lol. paiseh ah.

i'm so lucky to have found him. i literally tell him all the heavy stones from my chest. feels damn good to tell someone who actually isn't just curious about you.

so, i wonder who's your (reader, not the guy in the pic) best friend, and how you maintained that relation.

sorry for the unglam, but seriously speaking, i kind of miss ian.

we could have been best friends in jc too.

it's kind of sad y'know. in jc i only stick with him, no others. it's like we could be the first gay couple in jjc, literally.

it's such a waste that we don't really meet often already. actually we can but, sigh. i think we will have a boring outing. not unless you planned it well! luckily ian came to jjc, if not i wondered who i can actually stick with...

so, what would be a good outing? i think, a good outing will consist of YOU not having to use your handphone at all, or seldom using it. because, we don't have time to check! or we want to spend more time with the person instead of cutting off the social relations with them by using your handphone.

this is how the font of my blog is supposed to look like. but i don't think everyone has this font though ):

also, i don't like people PDA-ing. because i don't have a stead yet. i never experienced a single shit before, so i don't understand how my friends feel after their break ups.

this year, i'm not gonna countdown with my clique ):

because i stupidly promised my supervisor that i'll work during new years eve. le sigh.

must be responsible, though i feel like taking mc lol.

and i think i have made a new year's resolution already! really fast eh. i don't think sharing these will be useful information to anyone's life. so, i'll keep mum about it. you keep yours to yourself also ok. don't be a blabbermouth and go round telling everyone when they don't actually give a fuck.

can you come now? i am desperate already.

bits of what's left

2011-12-18T04:40:00.000-08:00

starting this post with some delectable dessert!

went jogging last week, hah. damn fail can. yl keep want to walk ): then bobian walk lor.. anw, we had subway for dinner and this for supper! at xing wang cafe. been so long since we stayed out so late alr!

i can't really recollect anything much from last week though ):

recently been working like mad? i really can't wait for time to pass.

working on xmas eve, xmas itself, new years eve. wtf was i thinking when i submitted my schedule?! somemore new years eve need go buskering until 3am i guess? ahhhhhhhhhhhhh. looks like i'm gonna countdown with my colleagues. sigh.

should have said that i was couldn't work on that day. but heck, i alr submitted my schedule. so must be responsible! lol.

anyway, went to this jap restaurant with nic last wed? luckily i was in a good mood! he got free lunch. hahaha. the food was just ok lor. really pity the F&B people la. work until so xinku ): no wonder i didn't go back to F&B this year.
then aft that, we went to crazily play jubeat. mad shit. but it was a day well spent! too bad we didn't stay out EVEN later ): sigh. because yl got school the next day, so we had to be understanding souls and accompany her home. lol.

but, i'm so glad to have so easy going friends ^^ steadily going out with you when you want to! because he no work la that's why lol.
so apparently, i heard my pay would be going up? YESSS. because i can open and close a shop myself, so considered a level up! lol. heck it, more pay $_$
other than that, i think working at sentosa is really a new experience, a fun working place, seriously much better than my previous job. didn't expect myself to last in sentosa so long! but seriously, i am just waiting for jae!
damn ): come to think of it. time does flies. in another few weeks, i will be applying for jae alr! must seriously start to make plans ): but! next year 18. HAHAHA. can go club and all. PARTEHH.

final pic! love you people. *hugs and kisses* ok disgusting.
but really, who can be better than them?! hahaha. it's like, both of them can be crazy, but i'm the quiet one ): i wonder how you all tahan me also LOL.
sometimes i also buey tahan myself for being so boring can.
please tell me how you all tahan KTHANKS.

i'm starting to feel like a grown up now! lol not really, wait until i'm officially 18. can do anything whenever i want!
i hope next year will be a great year (: please be.

words can't describe me now.

long considerations

2011-12-09T23:39:00.000-08:00

heheh. pardon me for not blogging for like half a month already? i'm just so lazy to even blog lol. ok shall start off with poly things again!

so apparently, i've got no hopes to get into sp and np BMS, because their COP will just get lower and lower each year. sigh. so most probably i'll get into TP/RP. preferably tp though? it's not because i look down or anything ):ok. intern. it was really very detailed. as in, how doctors work and stuffs. the part i think is the best is that there are people talking to you, regarding your enquiries of getting into university, overseas, or local. yes really cleared some of the doubts! and i must say, even if i stayed in JJC, i would stand no chance to get into medicine, because my cca is totally screwed up. so. is this a blessing in disguise? because i know that if i went into poly, i really needa strive very hard. tiring, but fact. i'm just afraid of screwing up again. it's just tough. hopefully i'll have plenty of determination next year!

also, i didn't get to watch any surgeries ): damn sad. the most i watched was an endoscopy procedure. woah and there was this huge tumour! ):

damn jealous of the other guy who watched like 2-3 surgeries. wtf can. but only allowed to watch those simple ones la? like 1-2 hours procedure only.. sadly speaking, i didn't took the chance to go and watch as well. i depended too much on others alr. cannot ):and so, christmas is around the corner! even the cable cars are decorated (:

normally, i don't really care about such events. but idk why, this year, i just am looking forward to xmas. maybe because these past few years, my family never celebrated xmas? the most, we just go to our relative's house to eat xmas eve dinner. really, i never liked such gatherings. like family gatherings. because, it'll just be many awkward silences between me and my relatives. and they will keep popping questions regarding studies. i don't wish to face them. every year, it's the same. because of my parents that's why i go over with them. but i think this year, i'll give it a miss! lol. i'll work. hahaha.

and also, we have a christmas gathering this year! idea proposed by me ok! lol. i still haven't got my xmas present for the gifts xchange yet. i really got no idea what to buy! also damn curious of what they will get too...

what's your ideal christmas celebration? mine is having a really nice dinner at someone's house(the best), snug comfortably into your seats. and have dinner! dinner everyone must like bring over something la. and then, all must be close de ppl. no awkward silences please. but what about the afternoon? lol maybe preparing dishes? please tell me what you guys do every christmas. because my family NEVER DID celebrated christmas, for the past 17years of my life.

also, there's this dinner plan on next tuesday. evan, dex, jl, yh and me. i am very sure that it will not be a nice dinner for me.so, short reddish-brown hair. that's me! lol.

oh recently, Marry The Night's MV was released! it's a damn awesome MV can. meaningful max. you can intepret the MV any way you want. i already did it my way. that's why i find it so meaningful.

na xie nian, also such a nice song. too bad i don't understand the pain of the author. that's the sad part.

you see, sometimes, i contradict myself a lot too. i say i want to go to RP because of friends there, but i don't wanna go to RP because of the way their exams are conducted there. why? because someone told me a very vaild point.

sp gpa4.0 =/= rp gpa4.0

and yes i really agree to that statement.

but going to tp will be such a chore? i mean. yes we will meet new friends there, some might even be as good as your good friends now, or even better. but the start is always the hardest, just like how it is the darkest before dawn.

so all i am waiting now is the opening of jae's application. other than bms, i really don't know what else to put... how? ):

reasons are reasons, lies are lies. no point trying to dissuade the facts.

the ceremonial

2011-11-28T06:03:00.000-08:00

where should i begin? the bright or the dark side?

let me begin with neutral stuffs first.

i don't have much stuffs to blog about this week. not much photos as well.

anw. the attachment to alexandra hospital was a little fun, a little hectic, a little disappointing, and a little boring. why? all we can do is to shadow doctors, hear them talk about medical terms which you know nuts about, and follow them wherever they go. it's like a waste of time. why? reasons.

firstly, those medical stuffs will be taught to us when we enter medicine. so it's like a sooner or later kind of thing.

secondly, we know nothing and can only shadow them. so we can't help the docs do anything, but to give them eye power.

thirdly, after morning rounds, we practically got nothing to do. and we only stand around. doing nothing. really nothing but observe.

really disappointing as well. because it was not what i had expected.

or is it because i expected too much? for was i demanding too much?

just like this picture, with colours it would make a picturesque photo. but with the black and white effects, it makes the photo more gloomy.

maybe this is how my mind works? filling in the effect of black and white to every optimistic plans i have. is this the reason why i feel disappointed?

but well. i did enjoy myself during the first week stay at the hospital. the one thing that i liked so far from last week was the witnessing of a live endoscopy. and we got to see everything. omg. yes and that's the only thing i enjoyed.

but you can't blame me for my cold attitude right.

like maybe the patient undergoing surgeries are in pain, even with anaesthesia, but we still do them.

i told my colleagues that i wanna be a doctor. better still a surgeon.

a normal humane reaction would be "omg you're sick." or "are you kidding me?"

it's like. after revealing my ambitions they seem to get a impression that i'm a sadist.

so what do you think of me? you know that i want to be a surgeon, rather than a general practitioner. so that would mean i prefer surgeries compared to injections. so that would get you to think that i chose to operate rather than to just be a doctor. and therefore, i'm a sadist.

you can say so.

but. really. is it weird that i like these type of things? are you NOT weird in liking things that others might dislike? maybe you're a sports fanatic. you like getting yourself all active. but why do you like to be in displeasure physically. why do you want to sweat and make yourself feel uncomfortable, instead of staying in an air conditioned room and using the computer?

maybe you like cars. why do you like cars? when they are just a mode of transport? cars of a rare kind amazes you. why don't children with rare talent amaze you more than cars instead?

my point is. everyone has their own interest. i agree to some extent that i seem like a sadist. but really, who likes to be named with such nasty terms? nobody does.everyone has feelings. yes.

by saying those insensitive things, i sometimes feel like an outcast from all the normal and cheerful people. i don't think anyone likes to be an outcast.

but still. it really depends on you. whether you allow their words to put you down, or to let it be just gas they let out, and pretend nothing happened.

just because i want to save lives doesn't make me different right? why can't i just be like everybody else. if i had known i would have just kept quiet. not saying what i liked.

i am not ashamed to let people know what i like, but it differs you see. the people who are going to receive the news differs. i would rather like reactions like, wanting to find out more out of curiosity and not saying negative things. although they are blunt, and being brutally honest. but once in a while, sweet talking is nice.

this is what i call, acting according to circumstances.

imagine. a very realistic picture. you got back your results and it's devastating. would you tell your mother, whom happens to be elated because she experienced something good, or would you rather tell your father, whom happens to be irritating by poor customer service?

many would choose to keep mum from your father right? definitely.

another situation. would you rather confide in a passive listener, or confide in a selective listener? obviously the passive one right?

ok. so in summary. it would be better if one knows and acknowledges another's mood and feelings. and then applying your skills to do what you think is right.

what i am trying to say is, i know it seems sadistic, and you don't have to make it more depressing by adding salt to the wound. i appreciate the honest words, but sometimes, i also need a spoonful of sugar. i want to be optimistic. but given my characteristics, it's hard. but at least you could put in the effort right. or maybe i was just being naive, again.

all these thoughts makes me feel, "am i transparent?"
it's like i am a fairy. but not like the other pretty or handsome fairies. i differ from fairies, but am still a fairy. get it??

i think i just made too many juxtaposes in my sentences. just like in my life. i say i abhor liars, but i still want some lies. white lies? they are still in the same category as a lie.

i seem to think too much as well. you know what's in my mind now?

people who read my blog may think i'm seeking attention. but who knows, they might think that way. but i am not.

anw. let's change topic. talk about the stupid things again.

so i had read up about students from poly entering medicine in nus. and only 1-2 gets in each year. so far only students from sp and np got in. with the harsh realistic aggregate of mine, the outcome isn't so positive. because i might end up in tp or rp. and i really need more insights from each of these poly. because i don't want to make the same mistakes again.

for example, if you knew tp and rp had no students who got into medicine, and you have a high probability of going into either one, how would you feel?

insecure? lacking in confidence? hopes shattering?

it's quite a stupid thing. but it's a fact. one will feel so inferior because of stereotypes or prejudiced thoughts others have.

and one more thing!

if you failed to infer correctly, please don't announce it to the whole world that you got the answer right. because it just isn't cool bro.

everyone has a world of their own. luckily mine isn't invaded by others.

first stage of depression

2011-11-21T02:51:00.000-08:00

first day of internship.

okay so there are only 10 interns. 3 from RJC, 3 from HCI, 2 from year 1 medical uni students from Australia, 2 from PJC, and 2 from JJC.

the PJC students were having a different attachment, and they got an individual doctor for them to follow. so how did i feel? inferior. the rest were from so good schools. damn.

assigned to a weird... 3rd year medicine student from NUS. sigh. so far the things i hear from them, is like damn depressing. why? the intake was like 50% RJC, 30% HCI, 10% ACJ, 10% OTHERS. lol we stand a 10% chance. apart from academics, portfolio and interview must own.

seeing the difficulty rate for jc students to enter, i really fear how poly students can go! like NUS medicine is like damn competitive to get in la. ):

BUT I REALLY REALLY WANNA GET IN.here's a map lol. so basically we walked ALOT. we can only observe what they do. and the students will try to explain what they did earlier on.

today learnt about pneumothorax. this patient had it. something ALMOST like pneumonia but another version. and so. ya that's basically it. what i learnt today. and that medicine students HAVE to be hardcore.

here's what they do.

first and second year: learning knowledge. mug like mad.

third year to forth year: internship. apply your knowledge.

and it goes on and on. not very sure also la. anw. first day and i already feel the insights are helping me. because we get to talk to medicine students! my future course! really want to go medicine..

and there are so many different parts. basically, medicine is split into 2 groups. physicians, and surgeons. what we are learning now are physicians part ): i'm sad.but evan says nevermind. lol.

so do poly students fall into the 10% others as well? wow.

really afraid something will go wrong..

i have to be hardcore for the next 3 years.

time kinds of pass fast, unknowingly.

2011-11-20T03:36:00.000-08:00

tomorrow's my internship! i am so damn excited. i hope i don't lose sleep tonight. really am looking forward, and had been waiting for these 2 weeks to arrive, since september.

and now finally, it's just tomorrow. i must say time indeed is passing fast. soon, it will be december. Christmas. that lovely occasion. and not long after that, O level results are out. and this indicates the opening of JAE! and i'll be applying via JAE. hahaha, hope i can be the first applicant. like totally.

also, after that. after being confirmed a placing, which would be around 26 jan, i have another 2 months of holiday, to work (: and finally start school at april.and then, i can finally depart from jc life. really hope my PW group, JJ138, scores an A. love my PW group mates. esp my daughter. lol.

yupp. 3009/1568 WAS my A level index. feeling a little nostalgia here, but after april, i am a free spirit. and i am sure my spirit would be glad that i've made this choice. to choose my interest.

really. i think after school start, i'm gonna want holidays again. well that's life isn't it?

did you make a wish during 11\11\11 11:11am? i did. and for 11:11pm as well. it was naive of me, but at least it's worth a try. no harm trying right? if you did, please don't stupidly share it out, not unless it came true (:

we all have our dreams. well. i think you can easily guess mine, but hey. not so easy. you thought you knew it right? well you were half correct.

anyway. i know i haven't got a confirmed placing at poly. but i think further ahead. i really want to get into medical school. i think i found my life. medicine. hugs and kisses.hahaha so unglam. but who doesn't have unglam photos. credits to irene anw. and so, we went out for a movie date. went to watch you are the apple of my eye.

the movie was a little touching. and more of humorous i must say. and the thing we normally face, was being shown as well. they mutually liked each other, but didn't think so. and so it just goes on and on and on. because neither party was willing to confess, being afraid that their current state of friendship will not be sustained if they confessed. totally can be related to some of us. the girl was pretty. and the guy was handsome. and yes i am jealous of the guy cos i feel inferior to him, in terms of looks. sigh.

anw. i wasn't interested to watch it in the first place, neither was i reluctant. that's why i watched right. in the end, i think it's worth the $11. they didn't portray happy endings, because i think they wanna tell us that in life, there is no infinite happiness. there is always half happiness and half sadness. and regretful things cannot be undone. so make a decision.

i'm like taking lit exam again, lol -.-

anw. the movie is really worth your time to watch! if i say it, i mean it.yes i cut my hair. first reason, is because i have my internship, and i don't want to give a sloppy first impression with long and messy hair.

ok enough. heheh. i got alot of my perspective of life to talk about now thanks to the movie.

to me, i think everyone is equal. everyone is smart. no one is stupid. they didn't do well is because they were lazy and most likely could not be bothered. maybe they tried last minute revisions, or burning midnight oil at the eleventh hour. but these are just minor ways to score.

i help almost everyone. once you pop the question, i'll be more willing to help. provided i know you, and treat you as a friend. i don't understand why there are some people who look down on others, hate others, or even doing things behind their backs. it just shows your personality. but if you were exploiting my help, i wouldn't get back at you. i just let you off the hook. simple as that. and karma will get back to you. there are certain beliefs we all have. individuals have different beliefs. why not respect it? i have come to learn to do that. i no longer hate christians. you could say i am not having a firm ground. i had. but i have learnt to let it go.

i no longer hate my father. although he didn't do anything to appease me, but i have came to a point to realise that, "why hate? will it do any good?"

i really think everyone is equal. even criminals. everything is done for a reason. remember that.i don't mean anything. so don't feel offended and think i'm a saint or something ok. i just pour my heart out here. my territory. my own personal space. just that it's not THAT personal. there's a line we all draw. and this is the line i drew.

love? i have longed for it. but i don't know when to pop the question. because i am afraid of losing that current state of friendship.

if the feeling was mutual. i will definitely not hesitate anymore.

there's a devil on my back

2011-11-17T06:43:00.000-08:00

ok i am facing this problem again. i know this is absurd, but i really have to make this decision myself. sigh.

so, i should try putting TP in my choices while making my admission?

COP is better, modules are slightly more, but there isn't any close friends there ):

or should i just leave out TP and put RP straight as my third choice?

COP higher, modules slightly lesser, but more close friends there!

and then again, i tell myself not to let friends influence my choice, like those typical friend thing la, "you in i in". i don't want that. i want myself to choose what i truly want. but i really don't know for now ): sigh.

the rip off chendol at the restaurant next to my work place ): $3.80 for this shit.

anw, i have this feeling of putting TP leh. then think of irene and yanlin, both cfm like a sad only ): cos they are looking forward to my arrival.. lol.

but who knows? maybe TP this year drop to 9 leh? then i cannot in leh??? lol. that's damn pathetic -.-

nvm. so this is my current choice: sp, np, tp, rp. all BMS of course. sigh.

today not a very good day? did an unnecessary refund ): and forgot what else.

mmm, but it was my fault, so i must say i deserve it.

anw, there was this guy from india, but he spoke fluent english. and he talked to me for like an hour plus??! asking me info about retail etc. lol.

and also met my primary school friend today! Nur Dianna. i must say she looks the same since primary school?! that's why i can recognise her so easily.

cheh. nothing i can really blog about.

INTERNSHIP IN 4 MORE DAYS. AWESOMEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE.there's always a reason for you to smile, no matter how sad you are.

a.little.difference

2011-11-14T07:20:00.000-08:00

hi. today i'm not gonna post any photos ok?

firstly, i don't have any.

secondly, i'm lazy.

today shall be a short summary of what i feel ok.

"regrets collect, like old friends.

here to relive your darkest moments".

yes, and you all know how much i am regretting going into jc.

here's the summarized version of how i feel.

special thanks to Florence + The Machine. i love her songs.

and so. i'm applying via jae. i hope this year you kids fail badly. HAHAHA.

anw. i feel like i went to NA instead of express. wasted one year. with the exception that I WAS FROM THE CLASS WITH NOBODY ELSE.

alright. enough of this shit.

I'M SO LOOKING FORWARD TO MY INTERNSHIP CAN. 21 nov - 2 dec. remember that little naive wish of mine? I HOPE IT COMES TRUE (:

damn looking forward to learning medicine.

next year shall be better ok, if the world doesn't flood like crap la.

i want to complain about school life, this time, from a poly student perspective.

dark.and.twisty

2011-11-10T06:38:00.000-08:00

i've been strucked with a rude realisation. maybe i was a little not prepared? didn't do my research enough? because now the fact is, DAE is for ex poly students to apply into poly. that means i have to undergo JAE again. and if this year's paper is easy, the cop will go down again. and my dreams would be shattered. SP ): goodbye.

really. once i get to know i have to undergo jae. i instantly lost all hopes for sp. sigh, so disheartening. but all hopes are not lost! because i am determined. THANKS TO NIC'S WORDS OF WISDOM HAHA. i shall be superior. make use of what i have and score for my gpa! i've wasted one year already. i don't want to waste anymore time. I DON'T.it's getting boring right? it's time to SPAM NEW THINGS. and i really mean new. not about me talking about poly. LOL.

well, first of all. it was my birthday a few days ago, if you didn't know. but hey. my photos are all in my camera ): so i really cannot post. because I"M LAZY HAHA. go my fb wall see la.

and nobody fucking took the initiative to tag themselves. i'm like, whatever. i don't care if you don't want to be tagged, i took the initiative to upload.

but i must say it was a let down. yes. a let down. my birthday, only my best friend appeased me, he brought me out for breakfast, followed by some tea-time. and a little window shopping. we caught up ALOT. sadly he doesn't like taking photos ya. it's like, how the hell can you find such a great friend? someone who was your primary school friend. and until now is your best friend?

i really must say, i respect and look up to him. even though he's my best friend lol. i remember, those times back then i was in primary school. i lost my temper every single time. i flared at him like countless times. i only cared about myself at that time. but no matter how he was being treated, he still was my friend.

really, i had so little friends in primary school. the friends i had were, only Dion, Russell, Andy? like damn close with them because we were always together in pri sch. but since sec sch onwards, i'm only close with Dion ): and really, because we lived so close, we walked home everyday. actually Russell also stays near us, but he got the school bus ride home la -.- so only both of us. so naturally i became closer to dion only. luckily for me, i met such a great person. some might find him arrogant, or even say nasty things about him. but he's really a very understanding person. but he's not perfect also la. lol.

i remember, after being posted to bukit merah. i really damn sad. because i had to start everything anew. because all 3 of them went to outram. i was devastated. i regretted like fuck.

and now? i'm also regretting like fuck. lol. same feeling la.ps ah you must bear abit. this type thing not easy to forget! anw. i'm trying to be optimistic here~ even if i don't get into sp. i have np, tp, rp. all welcoming me with arms wide apart. LOL.and so, back to my story. we went to sakura international buffet at dhoby ghaut. like WOAH. i did make reservations ok! ok plan at first was buffet town at raffles, but it was fully booked. oh ya i mentioned this before lol. anw. sakura isn't that bad either! wide range of variety of food. like DAMN. sadly i was too full to really gorge myself down with food that day. thankfully too. and spammed so many photos. went arcade awhile. go home. fucking sad i swear. but life taught me to not expect much from anyone. i really didn't. i just wanted to cheat myself and made myself happier slightly by lying to myself that there would be a surprise. but there wasn't. no birthday cake. no outing. no nothing. that's my 17th.

but i really liked mary and WanTing's gift la. haha. i bet it was mary's idea! just like what she did for me last or last last year! the alot alot paper and sweet. then ite is 10k @ cash lol. damn cute la, and creative!

and it all ended. what sia. i hope 18 will be better? in poly already!

i have a strong feeling i will be in RP next year. because i'm going in via jae. i'm like, SIAN. because, rp is damn far. like how i have to travel to JJ again. but at least this time i know SOME ppl there! lol. cheat. whatever. i deserved better, after living 17 years of despair. envy those who at least get to spend their start of their new chapter with friends. at least not like me. so fucking alone.

really, i first week in JJ. i went home alone i think? like sibei emo. slowly, got friends start to take 198 with me also hahaha. but sit bus only. aft awhile started talking, crap, and raping each other. oops too much info. but anw, it's that bond that makes our stay in school nice.

must change my mindset! must go to school because of the subjects! really, i'm learning all science. AWESOME OR WHAT. HAHAHA.USS. HAHAHAHA. i paid 60+ for this ticket. one hell of a ticket yo. well, obviously i spammed the roller coaster. we went from 11am-6pm i think. with my S22 mates (: and so, we spammed photos as well! not with my iphone, with my friend's cam! SHUT UP AVERY. my common words to avery. lol.

anw, i love his father's cam. CANON EOS 60D. i may try getting 600D as a starter set. well, if i got enough money la.

total, i sat 3 red, 2 blue, 3 mummy rides, 1 flying dinosaur (damn fun really), 1 canopy flyer. that's all the fun rides! lol. the red and blue one damn fun la. and we went during weekdays, so it's like NO PPL AT THE QUEUE LOL. although the main USS like alot of wondering souls, but the rides inside nobody -.- all too old is it. lol.

and also, the last mummy ride, the roller coaster was abit slow. and i thought, there was something wrong la. really. inside i was like thinking, in my mind, "omg is this a bad omen? that we're gonna die? like fly off track while the thing is turning at high speed?"

seriously i watch too much horror movies already la -.- scaring myself for nothing. lol. ite i'm here blogging happily!

OH YA I MUST BOAST THIS. we stayed at HARD ROCK HOTEL. HAHAHA. ok proof is at my friend's facebook album. because i used his camera to take, but it was another friend who uploaded it. ok i bet you don't understand what i;m trying to say. anw. the room like damn nice la. although small. but comfortable! damn lovely environment inside. ok wait one day i grab some photos ok. i love the shower head la. from the ceiling one, then like raining only. so lovely feeling!

really had sooooo much fun with my S22 lovelies. miss them so so much also la. sadly, we're drifting apart already. aww nevermind. those who think i'm important will remember me. lol.time to talk about work. must have a balance of sweet and bitter in life. work is actually not bitter at all here in sentosa. really like fun la. heheh this green grape jelly drink damn nice. hahaha. bought it outside the shop i work at for like $2.50 -_- expensive but i must say worth trying!

ok work nothing much to talk for now. kthxbai.

i wonder when i will get out of this entanglement of my self made maze.

the.day.before.my.day

2011-11-04T08:15:00.000-07:00

truewhat. anw, hi readers. i know you're so very kaypoh or maybe just a little tad curious about my life, so let me help you kill some time!

this week was, i must say, little more fun than usual? compared to the other mundane weeks la. why? lol idk. i must say working with my bestfriend is awesome! really, time passes damn fast with her la. but sadly, she's an intern ): means she's gonna leave, like early december. WILL MISS YA ):we zilian alot when there's no customers. DON'T ANYHOW SAY WE SLACK HOR. hahaha.

actually, i think, i am receiving lot's of bad complains behind my back? like not initiative? always appear tired? lol i don't really know. i never feel optimistic about how others perceive me as. the horoscope is bullshit la, say scorpios are optimistic. load of crap. then how come i always feel dark and twisty?

omg i love this phrase, dark and twisty. from Meridith Grey, Gray's Anatomy. hahaha. although she's fictional, but she's pretty! and i really wanna be like Cristina Yang, she's like the hardcore one. knowing everything at the back of her hand. and i remember deeply, that season 2 episode 15 is a really damn sad episode, because there's this 2 strangers, female and male, met each other harshly. and yes i meant harsh. because they were both pierced through their intestinal area by a long pole. and only one will survive. it's a damn sad story, i really teared up. seriously. but these cases are maybe fictional? imagine it's in reality. omg can. i wanna watch that surgery ):

ok i'm not a sadist. i'm just interested in medicine ):omg i love this can. buy for me if you haven't decide what to for my bday present. LOLWHUT. i don't expect much la, no presents, so be it. tell you a secret ok. i don't like birthday wishes VIA social websites. like "happy birthday :D" and short fucks. i like long birthday wishes, ESPECIALLY SMSES. well, i hope you get this hint when i sent you long birthday wishes! because, i only do onto others what i want to receive from others.

ok, and so. i really feel sad whenever i see christmas trees. why? for the past 16 years, i never really celebrated christmas. not the joyous occasion that angmoh's look forward to. it's like childhood happiness deprived. sigh. and now, i really find it hard to hate someone, yes really. but sadly speaking, i hate my father. like the opposite case of nic? i hate my dad. yes i do. and i will continue hating him if he doesn't fucking realise his mistakes. details? don't need to be so kaypoh. i don't share my dirty linen for everyone to see ok.went to this boring concert. yes i'd rather be blunt than be like "haha not bad la the performance". it was boring, because all the songs were not songs that we usually listen to, it's songs only musicians will listen to.

so it's not to go visit my bff (tg), and what. i went there because i treasure our friendship. ya if you all say bff and stuff i cannot shut your mouth ma. so be it ok. lol. truth is, i never take those words seriously. because i know it's meant to criticise the one you hate, tg, not me. for whatever misunderstandings you had with him, it wasn't my problem. so don't criticise someone else just because i am close with him. haha i'm so impartial. like duh. but i hate ppl too. i hate my father. just like how you hate the ppl you hate. and if you hate no one, you must be dumb to not hate someone, because hating someone is so standard.

ok. back to main point. really had so much catching up to do. i really must say. sec sch friends, sooner or later, we will distance ourselves from one another. because we may find better friends with same goals in the same course? i hope that's not the case. because the fact is, we (sec sch friends) only see each other during free times. while we see our classmates everyday. so slowly but surely, there will be bonds formed, provided you stick to that person la. sadly speaking, i feel left out from 11S22 already. esp xy, ian, hw, eileen that group. see their fb got them no me. LOL FOREVER ALONE.ok, so i've got plans for tmr already! duh. although it's not 18th. but 17th also big right?! one step closer to independence. lol actually no, one more step nearer to so many legalised things in singapore.

so what's my plan? tmr morning, my best friend, meeting me for breakfast at a cafe he bringing me to. omg la. so touched. not like my sec sch friends, he called my hp, and jio-ed me out. with his own initiative leh. damn touched )`:

then followed with a dinner buffet, hosted by me. what fuck lol. i so thick skin to ownself org an outing when nobody offered to organise one -.- ok fine. nvm tmr eat till happy can alr.

actually, right now. i feel sad.

i don't feel excited at all, because it's just a birthday. i've so much greater things to fear. fear of rejection from sp. really that's what making me nervous now. i really really wanna get in sp ): because only sp has cardiac technology ): sian.

happy 17th birthday lowell lin. i'll forever be the first to wish myself happy birthday, always.

november.is.here

2011-10-31T10:24:00.000-07:00

november is here! this year's november will be very nerve wrecking, and exciting one for me. why? because of my internship, and my application to sp!

i really really hope to get into sp la. like who doesn't. really, i wish and hope for all the luck in the world. because i want it badly. i want a miracle to happen ):

also, internship! i've really got no idea what i am going to do in there. super looking forward to it! because i'm being attached to a hospital :D

really, i hope it will be a fruitful experience for me. and i really REALLY wish, ok la quite naive, but still can wish right? i wish to have the chance to watch a surgery, the gallery also can. i really wanna watch one in real life can. DESPO KID 94. 94? i'm young. hahaha.the super hot pink hokkaido ice cream! really, in the photo it looks normal, but in reality, its really hot pink. yes, $2. LOL. but it's a treat from my colleague, Zul :D thanks bro.

i must say working here is another whole experience for me, from a F&B, to a retail. totally got no link to hospitals, in terms of studies? but in terms of service, i guess it's almost the same? it applies to almost everywhere right? "the customer is always right". yup. true. we have to respect them, their decisions.

but, do they respect us in the first place? are the service sectors being taken for granted? i'm not facing any trouble there, ok la maybe some, like i received negative feedbacks while working, damn sad right. i so guai also kena negative things..

but i really enjoy working here la. like fun colleagues, and most of the time i am quiet. bobian ah, characteristics.

it's like. some people can just blabber so much of their personal things to newly made friends. i can't. it takes trust for me to do that. i only share general things with peeps. if i share secrets with you, you are something, indeed.had some overnight (again) fun at nic's house. ok not really fun. more of SHAG. i only slept for 4 hours. and was being woken up by him after that. SIAN. but bobian. last min need help him chiong his math la. and i really hope you can at least get B3 ok -.- i was expecting A1 la. disappointed. LOL.

i also starting to doubt my own abilities? like, for example. my math. why i got A2 instead of A1? is it because i was careless? or i really lacked the ability to obtain A1? or was it because i was complacent, thinking i will get A1, thus i slacken up? I DON'T KNOW. and i don't really care, because it's really, all over.

and so, my twitter timeline, always full of ppl tweeting about "tired, don't wanna go sch, etc."

hahaha. go work then! you know what. now, I FEEL LIKE SCHOOLING. i cannot wait for school to start. i got another freaking half a year for school to start. I AM LACKING BEHIND. it's like, your friends in poly year 2, i'm in year 1. fuck. i really feel kind of intimidated like that, like i'm losing to them in a year. like i'm lacking behind. and i don't want to feel this way! I REALLY DON'T. i keep telling myself to go for my best when poly starts. i'm afraid once it starts, i will slacken up. I REALLY DON'T WANT THAT TO HAPPEN.

ok let's wait for next year and see how it goes then? hopefully my interest will overcome my laziness, thus pushing my motivation and therefore scoring well for GPAs. :Dthis nightmare, of wasting one year. is forever haunting me. i really cannot and WILL NOT forget this. because i want this to serve as a reminder to me, to not make anymore such mistakes again. and i think this will highly likely motivate me AHAHA. well, i forgive, but never forget. especially if it hits me damn hard. like a great realisation, like now. how the fuck can i forget this year? wasting one year. making the wrong choice. waiting for time to pass, working so hard to earn $$ to pay for my school fees and necessities. ONE YEAR WASTED. THAT'S THE MOST AWFUL THING. i know i keep repeating, but i really hate it la. cannot go back to the past, i know. I WANT TIME TO PASS FASTER LA. i wanna start sch, i wanna learn science, i wanna MOVE ON TO MY GOAL IN LIFE. AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH. I CAN LITERALLY SCREAM MY RECTUM OUT NOW.

lol i not stress. i just want time to pass.

i hope november will treat me good. i believe in karma. and i didn't do anything wicked, so i think i should have a fine month ahead right? especially third week. give me clovers, horse shoes, nah. i'm not superstitious. but worth a try right?

super repetitive post today. i . want . time . to . pass .

i . want . to . start . school

i . don't . want . to . make . this . mistake . again

must self remind myself sia.

how about you? i'm sure you experienced a bad year before right? like kena bully, or really damn suey. or making wrong choices.. or breaking up with stead, or loved ones passed away..

in life, there is agony. and mine is just so minor. but to me, it's a devastating blow. because i was GIVEN the choice. and i didn't make full use of it. so what to do? blame my stupidity. my best friend in work!

ok let's be optimistic now!

confirm in the poly is rp. ya, and tp maybe? i really dono which to go uh. seriously. so positive right? at least got 2 poly can in :D lol. ok. ending post here. even though i'm working, time pass very slow... 6 months leh, what to do..

i'm so not excited for my birthday at all can. i'm more excited, yet nervous for intern and admission ):

hey i just gave you a clue that imma november baby. lol. oops.

November, please give me all the luck i need! i really wanna get into SP.

deep.down.under

2011-10-28T03:55:00.001-07:00

today's post shall be a ranting post. so fuck off if you're not interested.

ok. firstly. it happened today. was really peaceful in the shop. btw i was working. and it was raining, until this group of singaporeans came in to the shop, all of them wearing tags la. and they were playing a game, given a voucher of $50, purchase the most number of items i guess?

ya so this guy's basket. was like so many things. obviously over $50, duh.

then need slowly count for him. ok nvm.

and then the brink's guy came. pass me the key to open the safe to take out $$. ok i ran. and passed him the $$.

then this tour guide came in to ask for enquiries to get into the museum, and asked me to call them cos it was raining shit and she couldn't go over. i was like, how about i lend you an umbrella? ok.

then this fucking singaporean guy. "are you going to do this for me or not?" to put the things in to the plastic bag AND i had to write down the code number and item description, BECAUSE THEY USING VOUCHER.

i was like, "please give me a moment".

he fucking gave me a jiaowei. MAD ANGRY LA. then i just tolerated him. and just went to pack,

AFTER i gave the tour guide the umbrella LOL.

AND the shop was chaotic at that time. so many people flooded the shop, all drop from heaven suddenly.

so imagine a situation whereby it was packed, and got this guy, NOT UNDERSTANDING OF THE SITUATION AT ALL, must be pajiao?, and i had to account for the brinks guy, cos it had to do with $$, and the tour guide, cos she bringing ppl into the museum. although i showed a little of anguish after he left.

then he came back for dono what reason after awhile, and i just diao him. like really. fucking irritant. play one game so impatient for? winning prize is your mother is it? dulan max.ok i've simmered down already.

here's a sneak peak to our halloween at sentosa! wondering "ghosts" walking around, and we can take photos with them. hahaha.

deep down under, i really regret this year. and it's a total waste. but what's done is done. BUT STILL WASTED EH.

old.shit.comes.back.again

2011-10-22T08:37:00.000-07:00

helllloooooooo, okay, my current state now: mad aching legs, and sleepy mode. why? because i worked yesterday, until 11+, slept at 1+, and woke up at 7. power. i love my work days.

ok, i really mean it. yesterday was day one for spooktacular, and i didn't go in the haunted houses, so idk how scary it was. but the atmosphere outside the landing grounds were not so scary, more of funny. there's this ghost, like a tribal person or smth, carrying a bow, then he goes around screaming at people's faces, chasing them, and scream again. HAHAHA. really, he is like the most humiliating ghost i've ever seen. although i was dead beat, but i had to work right! no choice. I NEED MONEY.i not that sick to save this kind of name for others. LOL.

okay, since i didn't post for quite some time, that indicates something right...? i know you're brainy. so i sense you have the exact sentiments right. HA, ok.

last week, more of slacking. ok and teaching nic, or rather, clarifying questions. although he wasn't FULLY prepared for O's. boring right? ok shall mention the worthy part of mentioning then. i went his house overnight, to do maths. end up? he went to sleep at 2+, so i played DN lor. fuck sia. say want do maths, ite sleep. then he said next morning do maths. what time wake up? 1+ PM. WALAO. screwed up day AHAHA. anw. he was kind. he provided me some tidbits. not bad ah.i must say his room is the perfect room for me. air con, with toilet. totally. it's a cheese sausage and cuttlefish, and i wasn't trying to form any shape, eg. a penis. it's so common. given a shape, i'll form a stoma. LOLL. STOMATA LOL.

ok. really, i don't know what to say alr. i'm so tired la. i'll update my wishlist too. send me any if you got money and feel grateful for my presence. i receive no presents this year = forever alone.HUAT AH. omg, i miss late night mahjong sessions in chalets. play all night long. and some cmi ppl will at there moan and groan, and will start playing listlessly. IRRITATING HOR. actually i also one of them LOL.

and next time, we play got "tai" leh. if not keep win without any tai where got fun. like eating plain biscuit like that, so mundane.

OH YA. THIS IS THE PART WHERE YOU MUST READ, THAT'S WHY I ESPECIALLY BOLDED THIS. LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOK HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEE.

i got in my internship! OMG FUCK YES. DAMNNNNNN. i'm so happy la. internship here i come! WOOOOOHOOOOOOOOOO. this calls for a celebration among my fellow imaginary friends. we shall celebrate tonight, with tasteless red wine, and steak that camouflages with the air well. ok lame.like duh, obviously i'd win. Diego is like pro, but still, i beat him.

OK BACK TO MAIN POINT.

this is the part which i rant. so stay if you are curious and wanna know my life. if you don't why you even stalk until my blog in the first place -.-

ok. start.

the damn choice i'm making now. choosing poly.

i already chose SP as first, and NP as second.

but however, idk if i can get in or not la.

so should i consider TP to be my third option? or just put rp as my third?

it's like.

choosing friends, or interest.

why? TP indeed learn more stuffs, and judging by the stereotypical way, their COP is lower. so a lot of people will tell me to try tp first. but i really don't know which path i should take?

the course itself i've already chosen. i will NOT change my decision. no matter what stories i heard, about how stressful it is, i will account for my interest.

SO HELP. TP OR RP. I REALLY DON'T KNOW.

and it's getting on my nerves.

I GOT INTERNSHIP TO CHEER ME UP. you know how badly i want this?! no. obviously you don't.

ok so one worry down, one more to go! TP OR RP. i should go find Aunt whatever, in the Teenage Magazine. LOLLLL. like she will help. sigh. this IS life.

internship turned me on, not my lustfulness level, but my interest in medicine.

regret.no.more

2011-10-14T09:20:00.000-07:00

do you miss secondary elementary math? lol, i don't. although sometimes it's nerve wrecking, but i like challenging maths questions.

okay that's not the point. my point is, i MISS maths. ok i'm crazy.

i finally did it. i went to school today, for the exit interview. the only thing that pissed me off was my mum telling mrs poon that she noticed how stressed i was. BULLSHIT CAN. like, i chose to NOT study jc studies, not i cannot cope. fuck sia, what if the mrs poon write that bullshit on my record or smth. then the poly will think i cannot tahan BMS because of the cop? AH DAMNIT.

ok, other than that, the thing was quick and smooth. and mrs poon told me, smth like, once i go into poly, i cannot feel like jc / work life is better, therefore i quit poly. like hello, i choosing the course I WANT, obviously i won't quit.food. i'm hungry. oh this california maki sucks ttm. fucking plain. i rate it BU HAO CHI. from ajisen at the jap gourmet town @ vivo. their service kinda suck too.

ok, are you hungry? yes i'm hungry easily nowadays. damn. and i'm hungry to learn BMS. seriously. i'm only waiting for application now. if it weren't for money, i didn't want to work. really. because i'm those lazy type too. besides, how is it possible for me to like working in F&B or retail. like seriously, not my type.

oh ya, this mrs poon pro or what. tell me i from sept-april no study, like take damn long break. so she suggested me to go take some modules regarding my BMS, and i was like, where can i find these type of modules, she hesitated awhile, and replied, you can try MDIS, etc. lol. okcan.

and really, when i stepped into jjc, i was like. i want out. NOW. i see my school, from a different perspective now. not as a student. but an outsider, with the stares from students. now i get how the bangala workers feel when they come into our school to fix stuffs.irene why you so happy, actually i feel your joy too. REJOICE PEOPLE, that person i talked about during my previous end post, replied my email. inefficient can. i needed to send her the exact email again today, and she replied like, 10 mins later. sigh. i got this ominous feeling, that they will tell me that their internship is full, and i won't get in. etc.

anw. she replied, and she provided me details for the CV. awesome people. i'm submitting my CV later in the morning. and if if if i get in the internship, I'M SO GONNA HUG YOU. lol. yes you, reading my blog. provided i know you, and you're not some spammer, ok.

so damn looking forward to this internship la. imagine what we gonna do for this internship. paste plasters for kids? do dressings and bandage up people's fractured arms? I HOPE NOT. but sure is let us do basic things la. not bad, at least i'm learning basics.felicia why you so happy? i actually don't know either, lol. ok that means no more joyous things i can share. ok agony time.

i need money lor. what else sadness can i face? break my arm meh. touch wood. i'm so bored. ok. actually, i don't really like working part time job la. truth. because it's not the sector which i am interested leh. awwww, too bad bitch.

oh yes another sad thing. i'm getting myself a christmas present. pathetic right, must buy for myself. i don't expect anyone to give me also la, i never even give others presents for christmas too. and this year birthday, i'm not expecting much either. all schooling, what to do ): last year was because in the midst of o levels? damn sad can. ok i'm not hinting ah. kk thanks everybody thanks.a little happiness. i can at least spend my time in the toilet to ponder about life in my bathtub. like the renovation costs so MUCH, but not i pay, ha. suck it up bitch. you go girl. suck up to me and i'll let you bathe in it. ok don't say i attitude problem please T_T where's your sense of humour. anw, i love my bathtub, seriously.

regret no more, make the best choice and go on. once in a while you can take a trip back to your mistakes, to learn and realise who you are today, and what made you so. because life doesn't consist of happiness. you need a balance of happiness and sadness, because that's life.

itchy.bitchy.spider

2011-10-10T08:27:00.000-07:00

i'm itching all over my arms now. due to the sunburn i stupidly got last week. damn. faster peel off and get over with life please dead skin cells.

last week was so happening. tuesday went to look at slippers, wed went to siloso beach, worked on friday and sat while feeling a little sick, and the wonderfully spent monday with clique.

talking about cliques, it is really easy to find people who come and go out of your life, like a stroll in the park. but it's hard to find those whom you can talk nonsense and personal stuffs with and still be good friends and stick together with them for like a long time.my wonderful clique from secondary school! without nicholas, felicia, mary inside the picture ): sorry if i forgot to mention anyone else! STM yo.

i guess i'm sort of lucky to have another wonderful class in JJC. because, we formed our own clique so easily. the 5 guys stick together, like without any bonding required. sad you're left with 4. anw, the 'clique' in jjc i had was small, and they might not take me as in a 'clique', but i think they are sort of closer friends to me, dont wanna state names :/ wait all start judging about me.

so you've heard from the one and only JC side from me! what about poly? well. guess what. the sad thing is, from RP, cliques are harder to be formed. due to the fact that they change classes every sem, but cliques in CCA is easier to form. if that's the case, then it should be, even break time, people will stick to their former secondary school friends right. gah. sad. not everyone is like me, experiencing a new environment alone, without any security of friends even on the first day. but maybe that's the reason that enabled me to make new friends.having all that said. i don't want to be 'influenced' and have some thought being injected into me even before i enter a poly. i want to experience poly life without any influences! i believe life will be dull and boring at the first few days, for me, with no one being with me in the class or same cohort, and others will have their circle of friends, but still, i'll just see how it goes. if i kena a class alot of them know ea other i jialat huh. actually not la, i just blend in lor! but if kena alot small groups in the class, that one more worse. cos idk who to choose sia ):okay, i bet you must be feeling impatient right, and having to read so much of unimportant things to you. let's begin yesterday!

we went to marina barage. the thing was, we planned to get drinks, snacks, and really, didn't plan what to do there yet. so. when we reached our destination, with the waiting of the shuttle bus for like damn 20+ mins, we realised we didn't BUY any drinks or snacks. omg, so awesome. anw. when we first reached the roof top, the first thing that came to my mind was: fuck hot. and i see alot of kites in the sky.. like that octopus.

the stupid thing was, we didn't bring any CARD GAMES, or anything to kill time, but only cameras. too bad i don't have my camera yet! shall try getting it before 2011 ends! so guess what we did? SPAMMED PHOTOS UNDER THE HOT SUN LOL. and it was with xuewen's and jiamin's camera ): so i cannot upload all 200+ photos here.i feel so proud of myself! taking this inspirational photo. credits: me. rate this unique photo please. and yes, other than spamming photos, we sat down and chatted. it got a little boring, so they started singing... so boring hor our monday? ya.

anw, i think kite flying is stupid. although we need the skills to get the kite flying high up, but i see no point. because once the kite is up in the sky, people just sit back and do other things. so kite flying is just a way to kill that awkward moments? ask kite flyers.this was the couple who was beside us the whole time. lol. quite cute ah their kite. they look more like passer by's walking pass each other, like in dramas right. ikr.

okay, so it got dark. and we left. realising we missed the bus 400, and the app said the next bus would be here in half an hour, like WTF. so we walked instead. until..... there's this part where the road split, either we walk ahead, or turn right. if we headed the right side, it looked like we were reaching MBS, because we could see the flyer. so we headed the right side. and it was the wrong side T_T we ended up at the highway LOL. it was like damn exciting. night hike LOL. with the cars zooming pass just next to you, and if you just fell, you'd be dead. then across the highway, we can see MBS, then evan wanted to cross the highway, WHAT FUCK LOL. then irene and me kept telling him not to la. irene like sibei ji dong sia. okay.

so we took 1 and a half hours to get to marina bay mrt again. walan eh. sibei angry, shag, and hyper sia. kicking random metal bottles on the floor, happily singing, hopping, screaming and shouting along the highway. you should try it one day too.get it? we were THIRSTY T_T and we had pizza hut for dinner. i was like, again........ and this time, mary and nicholas came! the only tragedy happened was that i spilled miranda orange on my phone, luckily still can work. and the waiter so kind, pour me another glass of orange. i should've drank more la, then free flow of orange.

okay. that's all about my monday. how about yours?

you thought i ended my post right? you're wrong.

it's time to talk about other things now! if you're not interested you can fake read or smth, to keep scrolling down like what bored people do on the mrt or bus. and going to weird places and just act as if they are doing something. i'm so smart to see through you'all.

internship! the person, i swear, replies emails damn slow. i merely asked and verify what details are needed for the CV, and she didn't reply me YET. it's been a few days alr. i'm scaring myself again by having the thought that i'm not in the internship, AGAIN. sucks right.

another problem, MONEY. really ah. i still haven't save enough for my laptop yet. damn. and i'm afraid by the end of this year, i might not save enough for BOTH my laptop and camera T_T damn. i really want a camera so badly. and jacket spotted for $40. i got sharp eyes sia. once a bowmaster, always a bowmaster LOL. i'm getting my pay this weekend! and i'm gonna spend it all. YES ALL.

another item i wanna add on to my 'want' list - shirts. maybe have alr. lazy check la.

and i'm like training for my camera skills ok! i may sound stupid, and i agree. so here's my photo of the day (: it's the couple again...life is hard, some people are better off when they don't deserve it.

doubts.of.the.basic

2011-10-05T08:54:00.000-07:00

food. i'm always hungry ): life sucks.

nahhhh. life doesn't actually suck if you know how to enjoy it.

let's start with yesterday, 04.Oct.2011

went to centre point to look at birkenstocks! rich siol.

cos i got work. HAHA. anw, i know which i wanna buy alr. i'm just waiting for my pay.

aft that. we had..... PIZZA. AWESUME.

actually, i've nothing much to talk about yesterday. feast for the eyes.and so, i had planned to go to nich's house to help him study the next day, and then.

*echofon mention from @iyeux" jio me go sentosa.

i was like, WAH OMG. 11s22 PEEPS JIO ME OUT SIA.

ok la, you know why i feel this way? cos you all so busy preparing for promos. face reality la, i mean. how is it possible you all would want to chat with me when you got promos. and somemore, next year also not seeing me. so i guess you might want to just remain status quo and not know more about me right?

wo zhi dao dui, hen xiang quan bu.

#mindfuck.

anw, obviously i agreed la. and i cancelled the study date with nich. awwww, poor boy. w/e.

and so. i just realised. I DIDN'T TAKE ANY PHOTOS. fuck. so my blog is going to be filled with inappropriate pics, not related to today's event. LOL.but isn't it great, like seeing myself all over my own blog? LOL FUCK NO.

ok let's continue. so today, they planned to play beach volleyball. the irony was, we DID play, but it didn't last as long as planned.

AND I DID PLAY LEH. why hanwei say i never play. that side was avery's side what.. so i give him hit ma?! aiya. play play play. then, CYCLING. i mean, cycling in sentosa?! like where could we cycle? NOWHERE. and xueyi made it. SHE LEARNT HOW TO CYCLE IN A DAY. damn. i couldn't in a day. fml.

and ya, cycle fin, we headed to vivo. wow vivo. ya rich peeps go.

then it was.... STORY TELLING TIME.

i mean. i really couldn't do much. it was all about r/s. and i wasn't in one before, so how the fuck would i be able to feel? it's not that i do not want to listen, it's just that i felt really helpless. i do not have the experience to say anything. but hey, WE HAVE EACH OTHER! although i'm not close to anyone of you, but i'm making the effort. stupid ian always say i going poly next year, and i wasn't happy with s22 peeps. it's true that i'm going poly next year, but i'm not faking smiles or anything can.... it's like, WHERES THE MUTUAL UNDERSTANDING. really. we barely know each other for 1 year, and why do we tell each other so much? why do we confide into someone else who is only your friend for this year?

maybe, because we know that we can count on them. because we're in this fight together, towards A levels. NOT ONLY ACADEMICS, but we know we can click off together, because we chose to stick with each other, during lectures, tutorials, even on the journey home.and also, i swear, i have never told anyone else my personal life before, yet i told ian. DON'T CHU MAI ME I TELL YOU, HEHE. see ian, you're like so fucking privileged. anw, i also never tell you ALL la. loser.

another thing you piss me off with. THE NURSE THING. you caojibai. LOL.

eh really, you make me worry sia. i now feel so insecured with myself, because you lowered my high hopes yet again.

but what you say partially true la. fuckk. XUEYI, SLAP HIM, THANKS SISTER. HHAHAH

i mean, nurse also ok la, but my dream is not nurse right. i don't feel ashamed to be myself. actually yes, i'm fat. fuck. let's aim for NUM's mannequin body, LOL.what is love? i don't know. is this love?

i like the person, but i'm afraid of telling because i don't want to hurt our current r/s, and sometimes, i think i don't really love you?

when can i tell myself that i'm willing to prioritise you instead of everything else?

i really want to try being in one, i want to experience it. yes i do get jealous when i see couples, because i myself don't have my other half.

when is it will i have to quarrel with you, fussing over small things that actually don't matter? they always say, when the right time comes, you will find your other half. ya when the fuck is it. i don't know who is so worthy to let me love until i am willing to sacrifice so much.

sometimes i think you are the one, sometimes i don't. WHAT EXACTLY IS LOVE. is this love, or just a fucking infatuation that i feel? when i listened to xy's story, i was like thinking. wtf is love, and all those questions were in my mind. i may sound desperate here.

YES I AM. I DON'T WANT A R/S DUE TO A RASH DECISION. i want my miss right to fucking appear fast. DAMNIT.

use tanning lotion to not become a lobster again bro.

whenhightidecomes

2011-09-27T10:03:00.000-07:00

ever been on a cruise?

are you those rich and fortunate kids whom get to go on the cruise for a couple of times?

THEN FUCK YOU.

because i've never ever ever been on a cruise BEFORE.

hahahaha. maybe it's quite dumb la, to sit on a ship which sails around the ocean for a few days, then going back to it's origin. but i want to live my life to the FULLEST. experience every (almost) all possible things in life that could have ever make me happy. w/e.

it's been a lonnnnng time since i've updated ): apologies.

today, i shall post about the most recent chalet! YES CHALET HAHA.

oh ya, and today, was on my way to tiong, saw JJC people. they J2's la, cos J1 promo exam is LATER LOL. it's GP and BIOLOGY. goodluck fellow 11s22 peeps!

there was this sudden guilt. of me leaving the class. and a rush of memories from earlier this year flooded my mind. i miss those times. yes, even though we're not close, we WERE about to get close. i even foresee who will be my close friends there, it's easy to tell also.the usual, MAHJONG! and i was really damn suey. SERIOUSLY.

out of like 20 games, i won 2 times? omgosh, i'm not a naturally born gambler.

yes, PA FLAT CHALET. the cheapest ok. i book before so i know. what do you do when you're in chalet? most certainly not using laptop! because that's like going into the virtual world already ): not even interacting with your fellow friends. anyway, this chalet was rather small. i mean small of a group. total only 5 people, which means, EVERYONE GETS TO SLEEP ON THE BED (Y) and seriously, got aircon hor, i most disadvantaged. IT'S SO FREAKING COLD. even with blanket, i really cannot stand it. until i need go outside sia.

anyway, there was this funny part ah. Nic go toilet, then we lock the room door. and he was desperate to get into the room, so he was like *BANG BANG BANG* banging on the door. AND IT WAS CONTINUOUSLY, SERIOUSLY SOUNDED LIKE AN EARTHQUAKE. so kelian hor kena lock outside. then later on open and all la. then my turn go toilet. WALAO MY TURN TO KENA LOL. i really was damn sleepy, so i pulled chairs and slept on the chair. after like maybe 10 mins? i couldn't get to sleep, so i tried to open the door. locked. so i bang the door also. then i swore i tried to open the door twice, it was locked. but they said it wasn't ): was it that i really didn't use enough force? or was it something else.... w/e.there. the anti-social. with a tied up fringe. but did you learn a chinese proverb? i shall type in han yu ping yin!

ren bu ke mao xiang, hai shui bu ke dou liang.

ya, this picture is actually ironically showing nic, because in actual fact, he's very friendly. HAHA. ok, he was the only one who brought laptop. lol. blame yourself for making your bag heavy. also, we went to watch Johnny English Reborn. it was relatively hilarious, but not those kind which make you laugh until you might die of suffocation la.and this chalet was DIFFERENT. we had a griller and steamboat dinner. for both days. awesumeeeee. so damn nice la. eat until damn full also, but this thing makes the floor oily. so poor Evan mopped the floor because he too black. plus, this saves us $$. because we need not eat out, super worth la this chalet. AND OH YA, another achievement. I NO DRINK ALCOHOL. HAHAHAHHA. so guai. actually, not guai. because, who says drink alcohol = guai. so true can T_T that's what my workmates shoot me with when i told them i don't drink cos i guai. lol. the ongoing process! hungry? you should be.

you can't imagine how full i was at that time. SUPERRRRRRR.

and it all ends. i swear time flies. just like the breeze, time past with just a blow of the wind. more of such chalets should exist! cos chalets most of the time you might think of "what to do" or perceive it as boring. but it really depends on the people you're with and the things that you plan to do. i think, small groups are the best. because it's neither too quiet nor too noisy. and those are the people you're comfortable with.

bus 5 all the way to BMC. poor Evan stopped at Newton mrt because he couldn't hold his bladder. luckily mine was elastic, can bear the urine. i love my bladder.ok shall talk about my work here!

FREE CABLE CAR RIDES. HAHAHA. seriously. at first i think it's like COOL. but after taking it for granted, it's like a transport to me now.

i like working at IOS. really. the people there are so nice. although sometimes i kena bully, verbally. but they don't mean it. like what i posted just now, shoot me ): BUT IT'S FOR FUN. learning to shuffle now. LOL. they teach me one. AND I KENA SCAMMED BY MAGIC TRICKS SIA. WALAO. and i the youngest (Y) so i assume they think me of innocent. HAHAHA. i don't drink, i don't smoke, i don't....... ya i don't. HEHE. although i hate the guests there, because foreigners ma. but i like working there. everytime got people come, i'm like hoping they don't ask me about the products there, cos i don't know a shit lol.

and so, i'm the youngest, so i don't drive. i really envy people who can drive ): really. that's why i want to faster get to age 18. so many things i can do. lol ok i'm going at it again. w/e.

AND HEY. now i'm struggling with the decision to buy which jacket.

jacket 1- cost $49.90. checkered shape (i don't really like cos so standard) but inside of it is like COTTON, TOUCH SIBEI SHUANG LOL.

jacket 2- costs $99.90. got wide range of colours. but one look you will think of "winter clothing" but it's damn light. and pattern is plain. just got colour.

or should i continue hunting for jackets? maybe i should.

AND MY WANT LIST NEVER ENDS.

now i want the wireless earpiece. because it's like so convinient. i hope it stops here, but it's impossible. let's hope i get $$ soon ): MONEY.

i really feel like a failure at times, with this decision that i'm making.

workaholic,what?

2011-09-17T09:33:00.000-07:00

i'm starting to love my work place. although sometimes there are hardships, the people there are so much better than my previous job. they interact, talk, share, etc. it's like a friendly place which you want to go back for more. and it's everywhere that is fun to work at. even though i'm new, i don't know much about the things there, so sometimes i really feel ashamed to tell guests that "i don't know".. but still, i'm loving my work place! i'm already considering to stay even if i have to go school, hope this gut feeling lasts long! it's like a bonus, get money, and like to hang out there. awesumes.and yes, this was the grass jelly i've had on my first day of work! it really is tasteless, and it's for freaking $2. imagine the tourists paying $2 for almost water. lol. btw, i've got it for free. HAHA. thanks to Aaron. so kind. benefits are really cooooolio. free cable car ride! what? YA FREE. and free entrance to there also la. fucking sandy white beaches. i can go there anytime i want. anyway, each and every job has a benefit. it just varies. different sectors have different benefits. for example, F&B can provide free food, and sometimes you can munch on things too. for retail, you most probably will get discounts. it's standard.

also, the place i work at, i'm the youngest...... so it's like, awkward at first. but there's one thing i really dislike. everytime i tell them i'm from JC, they'll be like *shocked face. i mean, i don't wanna be like treated as someone smart, i want to be treated as a normal human being. these barriers are hard to break, but one day, i'm sure the world will have my exact sentiments as well.be jealous, these are from Raffles Hotel. ok forget it. these are Snowskin mooncake with champagne truffle and ganache. cool or what. i mean, wtf is ganache? just sounds like some classy thing that is edible. and it really tastes like macadamia, with a ball of white chocolate with some champagne taste in the middle. Belated Happy Mid-Autumn Festival! well, normally, what i see from tv, people will go down with their lanterns, or burn some candles for idk what reason and what i never do, and they celebrate this event. but this year, my mid-autumn festival is spent at home, yes pathetically at home. because no one wants to celebrate it with me. fucking loner right. sometimes, i guess, it's alright to be alone. i really have to start getting used to being alone...and ta-da. my lonely meal at KR. sadly speaking, i'm getting used to being alone already la. my friends most got either work or smth, so we hardly meet up alr. whenever i sms/tweet them, they either work, or powerfully, reply me like evening when i sent them during the day. goodjob. it's like, most of the time if you ask me go out, i'm fine and all. because at least i can kill my boredom la. it's so depressing. well, whatever. i'm strong. LOLyes, finally. this is where i pen down all my WANT-TO-DO-LIST.

ok, so here goes.

-bleach hair

-get 2nd piercing

-fucking grow thinner

-faster get to age 18

-having a tan

-muscles (who doesn't?)

-get that $50 jacket, hope got discount by month end

-continue finding my slipper, current one is $40

-get my future laptop sleeve or w/e you call it

-buy the freaking 4 for $10 socks

ok i can't think of anymore. eh, if you're rich, and don't know where to spend it, you can give me some la. seriously. money is so hard to earn lor.

just because you read my blog, it doesn't mean you understand me. because some things, are not meant to be shared.

halfmonththenpost

2011-09-14T23:25:00.000-07:00

today's blogpost shall be about Mary's birthday!

lol i know slow la. heck!

kind WanTing helped booked a bbq pit D34, near bike shops, so that our dear Irene can go cycling. but sadly, when we were meeting (we- evan me nicholas irene) at bm int, only me and evan turned up. oh whatthefuck, actually no. i was thinking: standard.

bobian, my friends got irregular sleeping habits, my day time = their night time. seriously.

and so we just left. on the way, there was this indian who liked evan so much that he sat with him, fyi, we were sitting at the back, it was like ( me, evan, empty1 ,empty2, randomperson ), and so that indian sat at empty1. LOL. sad.

and something interesting. i swear they have good life.pets freaking got a "pet match-making" i was like WHATTHEFUCK?

they seriously got a better life than us humans huh. and please don't prank call them ):

and finally, we reached. went to 7-11 to buy some stuff, then we walked to the pit.

and....... BBQ LOR. nothing much to talk about bbq.ok, now this is the tricky part, i'm gonna blog about my life again, and the pictures are all taken from the bbq! so please don't get mixed up!

it's been the 4th day of the week since i've not been to school.

i admit, that life like this, isn't an easy one. living with guilt, regrets, and all the possible crappy feelings, trust me, it isn't as great as you thought it would be.

and hey, felicia and xuewen working until 16oct i think. felicia might fully stop, and xuewen said she'll continue working. and so, i was wondering.

would they put me to merlion instead?! ):

it wasn't easy for me to get to know others in IOS better you know!

i don't like changes, but that's life. sigh

anyway, these few days, i've been shopping like a shopaholic. oh great.

i keep buying, buying and buying.

why am i splurging? is it really to satisfy my needs? my wants? or is it another way to divulge my sorrows away? i hope not.

where i buy them from? shirts i don't really head down to bugis, because it's gonna be quite common right? i mean, when someone asks you go where buy things? the first answer would be bugis right? well not everyone's taste is the same, but i prefer going for comfortability. pants? bugis one are not bad. quality some sucky, some ok, some nice. it really depends on where you buy though. yesterday, i went to this shop, and their service was really great.

i mean, who wouldn't like good service? indians love them the most i guess.

anyway, they gave opinions, and all. and there's this thing i am surprised, people there can touch your waist and tell your size. i was like, giving the shock face LOL. stupid or dumb, both. because i was having brain jam.you must be wondering why i said "indians love them" right.

recently, i'm working. and indians love to visit here. so ok, i'm new there. and whenever i greet them, most of them like to ignore me ): as if i didn't say anything at all. i really don't understand their mentality. they are visiting Singapore and so they are just tourists. what gave them the rights to think they are the kings and queens? maybe back there you are. but hi, this is Singapore.

starting from October, i'm gonna work full schedule, which means including weekdays. i hope i can cope! i mean, i hope i can last until end of December! that's what i plan to do la. and if school re-opens, i really don't know should continue work or just fully quit ): must juggle school and work, is tough. so i most probably will quit.

also, 1st October, i'm so gonna submit my internship confirmation already. can't wait no longer!

promos are just around the corner, yes really. it starts next next week. i wish all my friends goodluck though. and how am i gonna explain all this shit i've got into to everyone.

tell them "ok i'm going poly" or "hi i've withdrawn from jc" ? or just keep quiet?you know what, a lot of my friends don't like the fact of seeing blood. i mean fixing injuries, not implementing injuries on a healthy person like what they do on movies. i mean saving lives. not many people like this, i don't either. i just want to save lives. day by day, there's so many other passionate human being wanting to do the same job as me, and maybe they are so much better off than me, in terms of finance or even having a relative who works in that industry. i really am afraid of not getting that job. why am i worrying so much anyway. future isn't here yet. paranoid shit.

oh and yes, did i mention that i want to pursue my education overseas next time? if no, then now you know. place isn't confirmed. have to research their reputation and admissions and stuff.it all comes back down to money. without money, you're nothing, really. have you ever questioned yourself? like is money really important to you? to some extent yes, to some extent no. it really depends on how you see it. to me, i vote yes. because without money, even with love and all those intangible assets, you can't survive in this world. and sadly, this is the truth. if you think money is not important, try living just 3 days with any source of income and any capital. how are you gonna survive? go down and beg others for money when you're able? then you might think, go find work la. then it all comes back down again to money IS important.talking about money, to us humans, money is never really enough. for example, for me, it's really never enough. i need more money to buy my jacket, my slippers, dying my hair,etc etc. because us humans, our needs and wants are never satisfied. and with all these overwhelming needs and wants, one day, we will face a crisis of not having enough stock of a particular item, take for instance, food. this scarcity will then force us to go desperate to get it, with all your assets. isn't life sad? we can never live happily just like how fairytales work. because, fairy tales are non existent. they are just created to please us, to give us fantasies, to give us hope to continue living on, which are all just deceptions.it's sad as well, how my friends don't really want to play pool with me ): because it's either no time due to many reasons, or no mood. this really sucks.maybe i've got to understand to not take them for granted as well yeah. so, i've decided to get used to living life alone. because in this world, really, i can only trust myself the most. yes i think this applies to most of us. i'm not saying friends are not trustworthy, i'm saying, sometimes, they don't understand what you're going through, so there's no way to really communicate. hesitations are common as well. like to tell, or not to tell. and stuffs like that. i know it's getting boring to read all my thoughts instead of my life. so, i'll give you food to see ok. enjoy it while you can, because in this world, there are some who aren't able to see. which is pathetically sad. and if one day i became blind, i'll kill everyone i feel. lolleft my footsteps at ECP! please don't steal them.

i can give you if you want some, so just call me lol.

urghhhh. there's so many things i wanna buy la.

jacket $50, slipper currently $40, DSLR whateverwillknowit'spricewill.

you might be thinking i siao ah, want buy DSLR for what.

although i don't have the skills, i'm willing to learn. because photos give us memories. i want them as pleasant as possible.

AND FASTER I WANT TO BE 18. YOU KNOW THE REASON LA. NOT HAVING LEGAL SEX, BUT GOING TO BARS. FML.

life itself, is full of regrets and guilt.

confusedandthrashy

2011-09-12T06:49:00.000-07:00

deep down inside, i want to be a perfectionist.

i want myself to be flawless.

but that's impossible, ya i know.

well it's not impossible to be ALMOST flawless right?

people do make mistakes.

and it's the great realisation that makes them a better person,

or the devastation that makes them a worse off person.

it's like, why am i pushing myself so hard?

reason is, i don't want to repeat those mistakes ever, ever again.recently, i've decided to change my lifestyle.

i want to be health conscious.

i want to treasure my blessings that i've took for granted for so long.

it's not like i'm gonna be a devotee to something,

it's me, who wants to change my lifestyle.

maybe this is a kind of escape which i chose to avoid myself from thinking too much.

really, at times, i really really don't know what to do.

by not attending school, there is a possibility that there will be a black mark on me.

and it reflects on my character, and is it worth it to not get into a job due to this disciplinary behaviour? no.

NUS medicine is impossible to get in, okay maybe not impossible, there is slight chance, but even if you're in Raffles or Hwa Chong, it's still hard.

i'm thinking of going overseas to further study after my diploma.

thinking so far ahead already.

because i want to wait no longer, i want to start doing and learning things that i really want.then again, if i want to officially quit, there's so many thrash i need to go through.

after quitting, it's either others don't ask about my education and they won't know,

or i tell them straight that i'm not in jc anymore.

this obviously won't put me off,

but whether i can get into a university strong with medicine is the problem.

NUS is one great university, but i can't get in.

and yes i will try first, but face reality.

thinking of the times which i swore to do my utmost best and score for A levels,

i'm laughing at my pathetic self.i wanna completely not attend jc anymore.

but with fear that there may be a blackmark.

others might think, no big deal.

but to me there is, because my future job requires strict disciplinary.

and no matter how i try to explain, i foresee myself not getting that job.

this is truly amazingly getting on my nerves. foreseeing the future, that might never happen.

how can i stop myself from thinking of such useless thoughts? i really want to just stop.

September is a bad month for me.

i want September to pass by fast.

October, that's when i plan to confirm my internship with Alexandra Hospital.

oh please please accept me. internships are just great opportunities for me to learn.

and yes, i've decided to go poly already.

just one thing i don't understand,

why is Republic Polytechnic so badly reputated in others mind?

i mean, the moment i say i wanna go RP next year, people's normal reaction would be either "huh, why RP?" or "are you sure?". like hello, what's wrong with RP? seriously.

anyway, TP is also another choice i can choose. depends on me.

imagine my life. my miserable life. mixing with 17y/o people next year, then will they be like talking bad about me? i don't know.

best is my class consists of my age people. like people from NA stream lor. because this way, i won't feel awkward. because, i don't really like people younger than me. that's the thing.

especially when they're studying the same thing as you.

imagine that. i don't want to even imagine myself in that situation.

the problem lies within me i guess.

maybe i've had a bad experience before? maybe i think that only people older a few ages or same age as me would have a little understanding of how i feel? not to mention understanding me as a whole.

whatever it is, i just want time to faster pass now. because all i'm waiting for now is the DAE. besides working, i've nothing else to do. okay maybe start to study poly sem1 stuffs, but nothing else. imagine living such a mundane life.

and i'm fixed at IOS, cool or what.

staff there are cool and friendly,

hope to have an awesome time working there!

for once in my life, i want time to pass faster, and not to rewind time.

justalittlesadness

2011-09-06T11:59:00.000-07:00

i do believe everyone's got a hard time.

i don't believe one's life is always so smooth sailing and successful.

i believe in failures. because they do exist.

i believe that even how tough you are, one will shed tears in their life.

these are the emotions that we humane have.

since we can feel, why are we all so caught up with ourselves, and only ourselves.

maybe because we might think, oh because you're you and i'm me.

let's say, someone is struggling so hard to survive, to fight for his last breath.

and another is there letting emotions get the better of him/her and wanting to suicide.

isn't that such a pity in life?

such irony as well.

i've really learnt to treasure my life so much more, and my relation with others as well.

not because of any experiences, but what more can i do?

someone's dying and all i can do is watch.

i don't want to be that ordinary and helpless person.

i want to be the one trying his damn best to save that person's life.see that white rock there. yes i wanna be like it in situations, whereby i'm the only unique one.

i don't want to live my life because circumstances put me into it,

i want to live my life by doing what i want, what i am interested in.

and for that, i obviously will do my very best to achieve it.

even if words and discouragements are trying to put me down, trying to break that enormously freaky dream of mine,

IT WON'T WORK.

even if chances are slim, there's still hope.

THERE IS HOPE.

you might not understand why the fuck am i doing this.

you might trying considering to understand such things then.

how about perceiving your dream job and interest to be something hard to achieve,

and all you've got is the interest, but education really puts down that dream because you know you cannot do it.

it's like you're a fucking bird, but you got no wings. but birds ARE suppose to have wings.

i'm mixing and turning all inside.

i really know chances are THAT slim.

how can you expect someone from poly, going to medicine course in university?

you might think that's really absurd.

also you might think it's impossible.

but the fact is, i may stand a chance.

and no matter what, i'm pushing myself hard to get that chance.

because, once you've realised what you want to do in life, you'll do anything to get it.

peektures

2011-09-03T20:50:00.000-07:00

i've always tried to put in photos to make my blog lively.

but i don't usually let the photos do the talking most of the time.

september holidays are here!

and i really didn't realise so.

maybe because it doesn't make any difference at all.

ya, as you all know. i'm going over to poly next year.

and i've done researches, university intakes are usually A level certificate holders.

however, i saw the pre-requisite on the NUS medicine school,

you require at least a pass in H2 chemistry AND H2 biology or physics.

WHICH MEANS, even if i continue JC, i can't get in their medicine. oh OTL.

remember i said eaerlier,

if they were to base it on interest, i definitely will get in. yes i'm so sure.

enough of this little rant of mine. let's start the pleasure.pizza boy. lol.

i stupidly went out with him. to change his modem.

went from sim lim square to funan digital mall.

it was like a mini adventure, without the camping mood.

also, if you reallllly know me,

i have this little dream of mine.

ok maybe not little, but a large, huge dream.

i want to study medicine.

i want to save lives.

i want to be a surgeon.

maybe i was gifted this mentality.

you know, others say i'm sadistic.

but if we don't save them, are you expecting whiny losers to save them?

i don't see this job as disgusting. i see it as a respectable job.

not because i want to gain fame or whatever, i have the interest.

stress and all is quite a big issue, but interest conquer others.01`september`2011

happy birthday to Mary Lee & Tan YiHui !

i won't publicise my words here, but birthday messages definitely i already smsed to both of you!

anyway, it so happens to be teachers day celebration as well.

too bad i didn't take photos for what i got for them. slightly forgetful ya.

the celebration, some items were nice, some items can be improved.

after the celebration and a long time of waiting, we went to tiong's griller.

it was suppose to be a 4F thing, but then suddenly Ong ZhongRen appeared. and i've got no idea why he joined in, so let him join lor. whatever.

after that. the rest sort of went to YuSum's house.

LOL CAN. everytime go his house buey sian?

go there also dota dota dota. maybe they like playing la, cannot blame also.

aft that me jm evan go bugis. went to buy Mary's present. the shirt damn nice hor. i suggest one LOL.

aft that jm went to the comex IT fair, left me and evan. at first yl nich want come over, then excuses from yl, then we heading home alr nich then wakeup. yayi don't really like spamming calls. because i hate them myself.

and so if you spam call me, i most likely will ignore it.

that applies to everyone ok.

i found myself a tv series to watch,

Grey's Anatomy. ok i'm slow but i think it's a great show. there are critics everywhere. so be it.

oh, i wanna dye my hair! but i haven't officially leave school, so i can't. fuuuuu.

i'm going for brown. obvious brown. give my hair base colour first.

i really am afraid, that if i cannot get into university,

do i give up my dream of mine?

what if i really can't get in?

screw life.

to buy a DSLR, they will put you through an exam before letting you buy one, to test your abilities and not let wastrels waste it. it's a metaphor, damn it.

wondering?

2011-08-29T10:14:00.000-07:00

ever wondered what's my interest?

read my introduction la, bodoh.

wondered what's my hobby?

then let me tell you now!

playing games is definitely a big YES for me.

name it, i appear, arcade, computer, LAN, blah blah.

you may ask why waste money huh?

well. do you study economics? LOL.

yes economics. the subject i detest.

because everyone have this need to satisfy oneself.

to make oneself happy.

bet you all getting bored alr.

okay, let me introduce the games i played.

arcade:

JUBEAT

SIGSIG. ya i not so crazy can play extreme yet, but definitely one day i can master it LOL.

yup, in fact in sg our jubeat don't have the clapping sound. it just basically appears in the box and you have to press it la. of cos got perfect, good and whatever lor.

see like very simple hor?

when play that time all come out at once and you're not prepared you will either stun or spam press ok.

it's not as easy as you thought it would be!

there are so many damn nice songs can,

Albida, Sigsig, Flower, and others is korean words lol.

BishiBashi

videos i found were just the games they played. you can easily youtube to check it out, or better still, head down to an arcade and play it!

Basketball

i don't think there's a need to find videos of basketball ._.

it's just for the fun only la. not say i pro or what.

that's most of the games i play,

and fyi, i don't play the maximum tune or what game, the car one lor.

i spend most of my time in arcade playing JUBEAT

computer games, i also surprisingly don't play dota wor.

i played maplesea, auditionsea, gunbound.. so little right lol.

okay enough of myself. my life damn sad la, nothing much to share about.

given a choice, i doubt anyone would choose to live my life.oh my so lonely first meal in KFC.

because i wanted to go library study alone at first, and shun bian get my bankbook.

luckily nicholas replied me when i was eating my lonely meal.

and so he came over to find me in the library lor.

before he came, i studied finish my bio chapter 1 alr ._.

ask me anything about it, i sure can answer you!

well. coached him math as well. Emath to be exact.

really ah alot of catching up to do yo!

but fear not, got me teach sure from whatever grade can secure a A2!

CONFIDENCE OK.ironically, i found this on my desk, in the children's section lol.

and how can the librarians not see this!

slacking ah?! tsk.

anyway, speaking of jobs.

my sentosa job has been confirmed!

it's gonna be a new experience.

because we're often switching places to do the retail!

and, i told the person,

during sept, can only work fri-sun. because promos. lol

then oct onwards can work almost any day!

smart people will know promos is just an excuse.

actually i'm trying to stall for time so that i can get done with the withdrawal procedures ASAP.

i swear this supervisor so much more friendlier and nicer compared to the one whom smsed me. but both same ranking, if not i favour this one more.

oh ya. and i found a free USS water bottle!

too bad not the love potion one, is the long long one.

epically, i wanted to return to the bus driver one, but then like so awkward... so just left the bus with the bottle LOL.

and the presence of negligible amount of people encouraged me to do so lol.

aww too bad for the kid who lost it HAHAHA.

hey, i ran out of pictures to post :c

well, will start random snapping again!

must keep this blog interesting yeah.

really feel like playing jubeat now ): someone DATE ME OUT PLEASE.

no need ask where, i'll just reply : arcade.

heheh like no lifer hor. my life is just SO interesting.

without music, it's like living without any inspiration.

rememberance

2011-08-27T10:52:00.000-07:00

still recalled the time when i hated bmss in sec1.

because i was almost all alone there, while almost everyone else has friends.

i still remember Felicia Ho was the first person to talk to me during the orientation week.

and she was the first friend i've made in bmss.

best ah my memory (Y)

then once admitted to 1C,

the first person i sat beside in Mr Kho's (however you spell it) homeroom, was Evan Chua.

i still remember we DIDN'T TALK AT ALL. he was sitting to the left, i was on the right, and i kept on looking to the right side. the only time i turned to him is when we needa pass papers around.

i still remember the first person to talk to me (other than WeiKiat) was JayPal, and he basically shook hands with almost everyone.

i still remember Mary Lee telling Xue Wen that she doesn't remember me being in the orientation camp.

REALLY AH MARY, THAT TIME I WAS CURSING YOU IN MY HEART LOL.

also, i still remember i scored top in class for CA1.

i was really shocked lol.

because i really didn't study much yeah. intelligence max. bobian.and bam.

in no time, i'm in sec 4.

why i got this certificate?

because i at that time in life,

have already decided to go for biomedical science in poly.

that's why i pushed so hard.

i still remember people asking me, why study so hard? still early what. so many months left.

i know. but when it comes to interest, are you willing to let the chance slip by?

maybe this motivation didn't affect my MIDYEAR.

i fucking scored 30+ for L1R5.

disgrace. max.

but i feel more disgraced with myself now.

why the fuck will someone choose to go jc when they've decided the course they want already last year?

why did i listen to Ms Prema's advice, go jc better.

why didn't i listen to my family's advice, go poly.

why why why.

keeps multiplying in my mind.

WHY.maybe it's time to let go.

let go of this thought.

i really can't wait for poly to start.

why did i try to be geykiang and head this current route that i've chosen.

i must say, really, in life, going through and experiencing something, will you then have the rights to tell others whether it's right or wrong.

sidetrack abit, the hand i drew last year really inproportionate ah. bobian not artistic.

i really can't forget those times spent last year.

found my journal for D&T.

all my rough and failed work that i've kept in there.

all the hardships spent.

maybe some might think D&T is a fucked up subject.

but i don't.

i really really really, want life to be peaceful, emotionally.

economically, in singapore, we're really safe.

imagine typhoons, cyclones, hurricanes, droughts, floods, tsunamis,

losing all your loved ones, if you ever get into these misfortunes and survive.

how would life be then?

i really think those survivors out there are far more emotionally unstable than me, and will be stronger than anyone else.

why would i want to think of death all the time?

really, those who want to live on and fighting really hard, struggling with death, are the ones who should be complaining about life, not us.

why think of it when we're not at the brink of it yet.think positively!

words are nothing compared to actions.

so it seems so hard to get happiness.

maybe i've got it, just that i cling on to the darkside of the sun.

maybe it's the characteristics that determine someone.

you can see people who are happy for like 24/7

you can see some people so pessimistic all the time,

that's just reality.

it just depends on which category of traits you fall into.

all i wish for,

is someone to acknowledge my importance to exist in this world,

and just a simple, yet peaceful life.

life is fucking unfair, to the extend that we have to struggle on.

disappointed

2011-08-24T20:15:00.000-07:00

maybe i should take back my words.

that my mum is the best.

last night, again while writing the letter,

she brought up the issue again.

saying i wasted this year, going poly wasting another year.

seems like i'm just a disappointment to her as well.

just a wastrel. hopeless being.

and i thought she understood me.

in fact, she didn't.

she keeps saying the reason why i want to go on to poly is because i find JC too stressful.

on the contrary, i don't find JC stressful in any way.

maybe once i move on to poly, people might have this misconception that i'm weak? i give in to stress easily?

because it's all in the mindset.

it's what you think that decides what you believe in.

because nobody will accept the fact that i was stupid enough to waste one year in JC, then finally realizing that i want to go poly.

nobody will believe me anymore.

since that's the case, then why bother asking me for reasons.

maybe i'm just someone not worth remembering.

i really wonder, who will even shed a tear when i die.

who will be even willing to attend my funeral.

and what for tell me you take it as i go NA.

why not just come straight to the point and tell me

"you're a fucking loser"

or just what your heart thinks.

do you even think studies alone can put me to stress?

then i think you really don't understand me.

sometimes, i feel that parents don't really understand their child the best.

but they want to act like they know-it-all.

in this whole world, the only person who will understand me, is myself.

what if even your parents don't understand the pain you're going through,

what would you do?

i choose to suffer alone.

all i feel now is..

let the picture do the talking.

reasonwhy

2011-08-23T23:04:00.000-07:00

i've unknowingly been not going to school for so many days.

is it partly due to my bad habit?

or is it due to my lost of motivation to even enter that weary place?

maybe because i don't feel part of 11S22 anymore?

Ian's always telling me,

once i get into poly,

the most i'll be is a nurse?

do you think nursing is such a lowly seen job?

i think otherwise.

i think that the L1R4 for nursing should be lesser than 15.

why make it 28 when everyone can enter.

even those no choice one also can enter?

why even base the admissions on L1R4?

why not base it on the person's interest?

willingness to commit?

what they want in future?

maybe because iif they did so,

everyone would be wearing a thick foundation, putting up their best performance, just to get into that good future prospect job.my awesome PW group! JJ138, yi san ba. bitches, unite.

even though i know them lesser than Ian,

i think they are so fun to be with.

rather than being with him,

keep on discriminating me,

keep on looking down on me,

trying his fucking best to make me stay in JJC.

you're having it the hard way,

BUT it doesn't work on me (:

sorry to say this Ian, but i'm still moving on. miss me and cry k.

talking about school,

Florence, my CT, civics tutor, aka form teacher,

lately i've been talking to her more often in school.

regarding the leaving procedures and stuffs.

i really think she's a good teacher.

even with my poor attendance or lateness,

i can tell she's helping me by turning a blind eye.

even though it harms me more,

but i'm just grateful.

even my bio teacher, miss ong.

tried to counsel me to stay and just get through with A levels,

all i did was to nod my head.

because inside i'm already thinking: too late.

if she had counselled me earlier i might have considered.the cheap mini steamboat (pork) at CIA2!

i only think the pork and peanut sauce is nice!

quite filling la.

although after that got stomach ache ._.

talking about service sector.

i've applied for work at sentosa.

and there's this planning schedule right.

need inform the person, called weiling.

i told her i can't work on fridays and saturdays.

and i think inside her, she's thinking

"most busiest days cannot work then still apply for work for?"

maybe she shy to reject me from work.

but if i get in the job,

i gain alot, because i get my schedule, and the pay is 6.50/hour.

where else can you find this? haha

and i told her i can start work from 5th september.

BUT,

going at this rate, i think the withdrawal process will take a longer time.

by then if i tell her i need change schedule again,

she's sure to flare up and take the opportunity to scold me, irresponsible and stuff.

aiya, this is reality.

unnecessary scolding is inevitable. just face it.

hope the principal approves my withdrawal.

if not she's putting me in deep shit ):my dinner at peppery! near bm int,

the salmon with weird white sauce is not bad! and the peach soda not sweet one ah.

they use soda water and peach syrup..

i ordered drink because i was dining with my mum!

anyway, there was this difficult customer there.

she said last time she spent $20 then get voucher.

and need minimum spend $15 then the voucher can use.

so this person came and told her that he said that it was minimum spend $20 then can use voucher.

alamak, xiao jie, make people's life so difficult for what.

next time you go work also sure kena one lor.

anyway, i think my mum's the best!

she told me, she takes it that i go NA stream, not wasting one year.

although she thinks positively,

i think it's not worth it for me.

i indeed wasted one year.

i really don't want anymore regrets.

so many things are coming down hard on me.

withdrawal process not smooth,

unwelcoming staff from sentosa, see her text style i alr got bad impression. thanks.

but think of all the positive things that are happening.

i'm getting paid.

i can use some of the money to go shopping, go arcade, go guitar lessons!

of cos my priority is to use it for laptop and poly school fees,

hopefully i can work till end of feb.

then i can use march as my holiday(:

if poly starts at april la. i'm not sure for DAE applicants. but that should be the case.

and the sentosa staff said even if poly starts, we can work weekends etc etc.

if poly starts, i don't have time to work already ok.

i've already wasted one year. i don't want to spend my future working as a retail person.

and of cos i'm gonna quit la. tell alot crap can already.the magnum craze.

my mum keep buying sia. cos now got offer, buy 1 get 1 free.

then usually she'll buy 5. so in total got 10.

siao liao, i getting fat already la.

my aim by end of 2011 is go down to 60kg ):

MUST MUST happen.

then that day dinner, going home. my mum and an aunty talked. when that aunty first saw me, say thought i the smallest kid, which is my smaller bro.

cos she say my younger bro skinny ma last time, then implying i skinny also la?

then once she know i am the 3rd child, then she" WAH TA SHOU HEN DUO LEH"

lmao. people know me since young will say that la. hear till si kong jian guan alr.

but then, people who just know me will think i'm just fat.

ya la i really fat ma, but they don't know how fatter i was in the past lol.hear this already cfm sad right. even twitdeck agrees with me ):

knowing the fact you're fat and someone calling you fat is like huo shang jia you.

aiya cannot blame lor. cos fat so easy to say out ma.

regret eating so much last time ._.

then now must so xin ku go jian fei. sian sia.

but now bad la. jog until my stamina improve sia. last time awhile alr want die. lolol.lately, i'm more bothered by the withdrawal process and the job in sentosa. scared will clash or whatever shit. anyway, why care so much?

smurfs showing on 1st september!

yepp, it's teachers day celebration!

would you rather choose to go to your:

A) primary school

B) secondary school

C) polytechnic / JC / ITE

D) go out with friends

i'm choosing B this year :D

wonder what to wear also lol. and seriously don't know what we gonna do aft the celebration. eat? eat lunch and then? i want it to be a whole day event though ):

really miss the times last year.

oh so memoriable. everything is almost just like yesterday.

oh yeah.

heard that driving license is to be taken at 21 for us?

omg. if 18 good la. but even if i get license i no car what ._.

can go clubbing also!

once 18, life is different. 1 more year to go.

life is really funny.

when we're older, we wish to be young again.

when we're younger, we wish to be older.

life is full of irony.

how i wish life is worry-free.

or maybe it's just a naive thinking.

going through all the hardships are just part of life; unavoidable process.

allthecrap.

2011-08-21T03:33:00.000-07:00

what's life if we were to live in anguish all the time?

live in regrets all the time?

live in sadness all the time?

why choose those emotions when you can remain exultant.

being positive isn't a bad thing as well.

let's say. why bother to care about what others think?

why not just follow your own thinking.

why feel bothered about others criticism.

just be yourself.

i chose to be happy. but why am i not?

i don't see a reason to feel shy about it, nor hiding the fact that i don't feel so.

i've got so much things i wanna accomplish in life.

this sucks.

tomorrow's monday. gotta start filling up the withdrawal form.

so many procedures. so i guess i'm staying in JJC till end of this week.

job interview's been postponed to tomorrow at 4.30pm.

obviously i'm not attending extra classes.

i'm already on the edge to leaving the school.

so please don't try and talk me into staying,

save the effort.

i'm gonna miss those days, 2011 spent in JJC.

there isn't a need to spell everything out.

yes i will be straight to the point.

i've made some real friends, and plenty of normal and fake friends there.

sad to say, i'm not gonna attend prom night with 11S22.

teacher's day round the corner!

anticipating it:D

preparing gifts for teachers. hahaha.

if you've been good to me your gifts will be more valuable of course.

hope this will be a memoriable gift for you.

come to think of it, the teacher i wanna thank most is miss leong:D

helped me out in D&T alottttttt.

really, other than that, she was a listening ear as well.

we've became more of friends than a teacher-student relation.

so sorry for not having photos ):

will get some new ones soon.

so ya, my mum was agreeable for me to leave school.

and she asked me to ask the school for the procedures tomorrow.

well-done.

i hope i can make full use of this time to earn $$.

and not forgetting preparing for next year's semester 1!

what will i do with the money? KEEP.

most likely i'll keep around 80-90% of it, leaving the rest to spend!

ARCADE, SHOPPING, MUSIC.

memoirs.

2011-08-18T04:24:00.000-07:00

remembering the times of 2010.

before taking chinese oral, lc and paper, i really hoped so hard for my first time.

i really hoped i won't let my mum down by getting a shitty result.

i told myself, i came so far. 10 years of education.

this is the first ever paper i'm ever sitting for such a major exam,

a certificate that entitles my future.

i told my friends, getting a B3 and i would be contented, and NOT re-take.

when i got back my results.

i really jumped for joy.

i really teared up.

i got a B3.

i got what i did not expect to get, because at that time, i thought i would be getting a B4.

that was the moment when i was really relieved.

but then, greed came along.

my chinese teacher said that because my oral was a distinction, i stood a chance to score better.

and so i listened to her and tried again.

i didn't get a better score, and i finally know the reason why.

because i didn't do much to improve my chinese.

the days ahead is tough.

really stressed up for D&T.

because the deadline was getting closer and closer.

i remember the time where miss leong got a teacher who used to help in the moderation.

he told me my journal would get a C5/C6

i was naive.

i believed him. i really teared up, even mary was there to witness it.

why i teared up? because i really put in so much effort in that journal.

it was almost part of my life in 2010.

i spent almost everyday doing it. reflections here and there.

it was really like my diary.

in the end, he was joking.

miss leong told me that i was an A1 student.

but, unexpectedly, i got B3.

i was devastated. i really thought i could get A1.

i really thought so.

maybe because i was too conceited, so i didn't put in much effort for my theory paper, which resulted in my B3.

really. do you think design and technology is a subject, whereby it's for the lousier students?

i really want answers.

i received some.

they were obviously from better schools, and d&t to them is like a lowly seen subject.

sadly speaking, out of all the subjects,

i only liked the times during d&t lessons.

really. overnights in cafes and chionging work, lepaking, slacking.

i don't regret taking this subject. given another chance, i will still take it.

i'm so stressed recently.

because i don't think i can withdraw from school yet.

how am i suppose to work?

i need the money you know.

i'm not from a rich family.

i need to support myself with this insane fee in poly.

why am i feeling stressed up with matters like this?

keeping myself awake early in the morning 4am.

sitting there blankly doing nothing.

i really don't know why i feel stressed over this.

or maybe this isn't stress?

is this actually just a feeling of anger?

just because i don't get things going my way, i flare up?

i really don't know.

i don't.

LaCampanella

2011-08-14T04:03:00.000-07:00

here's a song i fell in love with,

of course there's an original version of this piece on youtube,

but i prefer this because it's remixed and shorter.

the mv itself also makes a little no sense.

but you can intepret it however you want.

especially love the ending part.the random colours on my screen made me happy for a moment,

because i was thinking: i bet others don't even have a chance to see this on theirs.

#likeaboss

anyway. i told my mum about the dispute within myself.

i told her i'd rather work.

she asked me:

go where work?

well now sure got a lot of places hiring one.

so. i guess.

that's an agreement from her.

you may think i'm crazy, i'm stupid, i'm a wastrel.

yes i agree with all those.

but at least, i know what i want.

i know what suits me. i don't want to regret living a manipulated life again.

i'm not saying my parents forced me to getting into jc.

in fact they disapproved it.

i was dumb not to listen to them.

being stubborn and saying i want to get into jc.

oh fuck my mind then, what was i thinking?went to vivo yesterday with felicia.

she very funny ah.

tell me go vivo shop for teachers day present.

i told her i wanted to do a DIY card, she say" ya i think i DIY too"

alamak! no tell me earlier!

vivo where got DIY shops?! want go then is go plaza sing the DIY shop or maybe go artfriend ma. aiya. felicia jiu shi felicia ._.

anyway, after walking around aimlessly, we went to grab a bite, frozen yoghurt!

really had a long chat with her.

we both shared our burdens and our life stories.

really, sometimes in life, we need to confine in to someone.

because this way, it's not to attract attention,

but to let your friends know that they are worthy of knowing your every single truth.

letting them know that you put them in your priority list.didn't take photos of the braised chicken and mango dessert ):

i still remember, it was at block 128A.

7th month dinner ):

auction and stuffs.

super noisy ah. but, spirits like it?

maybe because in their dimension it's all silence, the gloomy mood and all.

i'm just infering, so spare me.

i'm gonna ask florence tml regarding poly stuffs.

hope you give me good advices.

or rather, tell me the procedures needed.

tuesday is my Chemistry SPA,

well i think i'm gonna give it a miss.

so that i won't be even having second thoughts in staying in JJC.

yes i've made up my mind.

i'm going to poly next year.

-whether life disabilities, left you outcast, bullied or teased, rejoice and love yourself today, cos baby, you were born this way♥

regrets

2011-08-12T02:11:00.000-07:00

always wondered what others do when they're bored.

for me, i either laze around at home, finding things to do, or go out with friends.

maybe that's what almost everyone does.

just that the things that we do differs.go out to catch up with friends is one of the option.

or would you rather meet up your classmates which you barely talk.

the other party might not even want to meet up with you, because we're not worthy of their time of vice versa.

because the relationship between us are almost strangers,

so obviously i choose to go out with closer people.

it's just like how people in life choose their friends.

or rather, how life arrange the people we meet and become close to.

i dare to say that really,

i've made great friends in JJC,

and great classmates in 11S22,

but i think, i've decided.

yes, indeed going through the JC route will be easier to get into university,

and my dream course coincidently is MEDICINE, requires AAA/A lol.

i doubt i can do it. because i know my limits.

thus i've decided to move on.

maybe life would be different there. with lot's of backstabbers, people who look down on me, blah blah.

but the interest is there.

imagine you have to go through life in poly with all the 1995 people.

or some 1994 ones.

imagine going through orientation camp again.

starting everything anew.

also, i got this bad habit.

laziness. oversleeping for school or being frequently late.

what if i go poly. with this bad habit.

and i need to keep getting MC? apply LOA?

so would you rather choose a path which you know it's beyond your limits to get AAA/A;

or choose a path which although you know it's tough, but with your interest being there?

please tell me your answer, impartially.pool! one of my interest:D

luckily my friends play them too.

if not i dont know who to find to play with.

anyway, what do people do when they're lost and confused?

truthfully, up till this stage, i really don't know whether to continue this current route of choice or not.

seeing others choosing poly over jc then they can get into jc, really makes me wonder in the past, why they chose something else.

but now i've come to realise. that they know their interest is there, and now should be having a fun time with no regrets.

i think i'm stupid right. wasting one year in jc, then realising i'm on the wrong track.

i really regret making this choice.

sometimes i feel like doing crazy things.

because i really can't make up my mind.

like standing in the middle of the road. watching cars pass by me.

of sitting on the edge of a building.

maybe by experiencing near-death situations, i'll realise what i really want in life?so i've considered about both paths. path 1, moving on to poly route.

if i decided to do so, then why should i remain in jc wasting my life away?

i rather drop out of school and just start working part time, earning money is obviously better than spending my parent's money.

also, i need to start earning money because i require a laptop also, which is not cheap.

but before i can do this i need to ask the school.

do you even think the school will allow this?

i doubt so. but even if they do, they'll leave a black mark for me?

i don't see how much of a black mark they can leave for me though. being consistently late or absent from school without any reason would be good enough for them to blackmail me.

but i've got my points in leaving the school as well.

other than that, i need to start thinking and changing my bad habits..

i agree with florence, my CT, that saying that i overslept and not attending school is a valid reason, and that i have to do something about it.

i've really tried my best. but sometimes i really am tired.

others can do it, why not me?

that's because everyone is different.

their mindset and personality differs.

not everyone is equal.

so i don't think comparing me with others is a good idea as well.

besides these, upon entering poly, needa make new friends.

heard from my friends that poly also alot hypocrites. two-faced people, etc.

i can tolerate those nonsense, but if they really too much then i'll also blow up as well.

another path, remaining in JC.

i can do that, but i can get no guarantee that i can get AAA/A.

also, i don't think i can pass year one this year,

because all my motivation is gone.

in terms of studying.

i already lost the mood to study. i already see no point in studying because the most i can get is ABB/A or even worse?

you may think: you never try you'll never know.

do you need to try something which you know you cannot do?

for instance,you dream to complete your 2.4km run in 9mins. but the best you can do is 14mins. even with so much training, the most you can improve is until 12mins?

others might be able to achieve it, but all these are in you.

if it's not in you, then why bother to even dream about it?

my dream is to get into medicine course,

choosing the doctor route in life.

but i see no confidence in myself of getting into that course at all.

because it's beyond my limits.so after considering all the factors,

and i hate to say this.

i've decided about 80% to move on to poly.

yes, i hate that to happen, but i wouldn't want to waste another 4-5 years of my life already. by failing to achieve good results for A levels, then moving on to poly.

if you want to further argue here. refer to my reasons i've provided.

it's beyond my limits.

even though life is tough, i've gain so much experience.

and i dare to say i do regret going in to JC.

with my naive thinking that i can ace.

forgetting the fact that in JC the moderation is really like shit,

because we're fighting it all out with those smartypants.let's put academics to a halt.

MOONCAKES.

i've got no idea why my dad brought them home.

from some hotel, forgotten the name already.

it's really sweet. after eating them ah, i drink ice lemon tea NO TASTE.

tropical fruits (Y)

green apple, peach, durian, jackfruit.

imagine if life was sweet,

just like mooncakes.

that would be insane. because everyone would be so happy?

then where's the unhappiness? gone with the wind?

life will never be so smooth sailing for all of us.

it's the problems and shit in life that makes us stronger.maybe not everyone is as blessed as me.

having understanding parents,

and they don't despise me for wasting a year, in fact they gave me encouragements.

if only i'd listen to my mum. not choosing jc. what more can i ask for in life?

recently i'm back into DJ MAX!

mozarc is an example, it's the arcade version, with touchscreen for you to press.

it's like pressing a piano. the keys go down.

i don't know why but i like these songs:

whiteblue, memoirs, nightmare,

and some other songs which i can't remember the name..

another sad thing.

my oversleeping habit.

today's a classic example.

i know that my mum's disappointed,

but she doesn't express it out.

it's only when the cases are extreme, like 2/3 times a week,

then she will start nagging at me.

quite true, because in reality, who would want to employ someone who is consistently late?

tell me what should i do to get rid of this bad habit..?i'd love to have such a beautiful toilet in future.

relaxing in the bathtub after a long day of work.

ahhhhhhhhh. soothing and refreshing.

and, if i get to have my own house, i would buy a simple one, and the toilet must be able to install this bathtub!

then i would renovate the house myself, this way i can express myself through my house.

another thing which i'm really curious about.

why poly students and jc students receive different treatments?

for example, poly students have to pay more for travelling expenses, when they are students as well?

another classical example would be why jc students are restricted to show themselves via their hair?

will having long hair affect their studies? no.

will having coloured hair leave a bad impression to their school? no.

it all comes back down to us, people.

we tend to make a first impression of something through their appearance.

then. how do you know someone is a thief? is the word thief imprinted on their face? no.

humans are weird beings.

we tend to judge others before we judge ourselves.

why stereotype that jc students are better? smarter? nerds?

why stereotype that poly students are lousier? not a wise choice?

i swear this makes me curious.this got me to remember.

i had a dream last night, and it was about me being haunted by a ghost. quite funny.

i was using the toilet, when suddenly the showerhead starting sprinkling water.

i turned the handle to off it, and it keeps oning forcefully.

why do we have this mindset that when it's the 7th month spirits are around us?

i mean. aren't spirits all around us the whole time?

do you believe in them?

i've posted my answer in one of my previous post already. so there's no need for me to repeat myself i guess.

i really want to encounter one.

then i can see how my reaction would be upon seeing them.

and what i would do.so.. smile!

i want myself to blog about how great poly life is.

i want to blog about how much i don't regret being there.

it's not because of anyone that i want to leave jc, it's the studies that i'm not interested in.

and i want everyone to know that i've made the wrong choice.

i don't want to hide the truth.

because i don't see a reason to hide it.

-i really hope this is the last time i've made such a stupid decision in life anymore..

it'shardtoletgo.

2011-08-09T01:43:00.000-07:00

so many things happened during these few weeks, which i didn't blog.

reason? many. either i was too lazy, no photos, or had no time.

let's begin (;

BDD! blood donation drive.

yes, i've donated blood.

frankly speaking,

it isn't as painful as i thought it would be.

even when the ma zui yao was injected into my veins, it was nothing compared to the nail surgery i had.

after donating, nurse said cannot do strainous exercises, so i had to forgo my jog that day ):

and really,

after the donation, my right hand felt weak. cannot carry heavy stuffs, it's true.and so..

here's my certificate! haha.

well it's almost perfect,

the handwriting sucks. thanks uh. for ruining my virgin BDD cert.

anyway the cert is nothing much.

i'm glad i have no HIV.

and that i am able to donate my healthy blood.

i just don't understand some people.

they are ABLE to but NOT willing to donate,

selfish acts.

hmmmm.

maybe i am no one to judge you,

but just to let you know people will appreciate your help.

maybe in the future there isn't enough blood to save me?

i won't blame anyone.

because we're gonna die sooner or later.

death is just a matter of time.next, late night steamboat!

at chinatown.

my mum's first reaction: HAR?

which i think she meant that there the food not very clean la.

thats what i intepret.

anyway, the next day i got laosai. damn sad right.

maybe my mum was right hahaha.

still remember while eating,

suddenly alot of ashes flying in the air.

that feeling was like.

in television.

it's 7th month anyway.

i partially believe in ghosts.

but i don't see any reason to fear them?

like. if you had no connection with them, why fear them?

and if it was your relative, all the more you shouldn't be afraid.

because they've come to visit you.

that shows how much they can't bear to leave you right.

talking about that,

i really miss my ahma.

it's not like she's dead or something.

she's living in my aunt's house.

and she's gonna continue living there. because my aunt says her house got maid to take care of her.

so that means.

my ahma is occasionally staying back in her own house( where i'm living ) for a few days.

whatthefuck.

what's worse is that she says she misses me.

i feel fucking sad.

fucking guilty.

i didn't do much for her.

but she had put in so much for me.

why the fuck am i so selfish?

receiving all the love, not returning any?

it really pains me inside to hear that she misses me from her.

because i can't help feeling anymore guilty.

doctor says her health isn't good, etc.

all the more i want her to stay back here.

but she's receiving care there.

i have not much say in the family either.

so what can i do?

call her? ask how she's doing and stuff?

is that even enough?

i just want you to come back home...

even if you nag, tell me your life stories,

i don't mind.

in fact, the absence of it is weird.

maybe i'm too used to it?

about all your grumbles and stuff?

i can even remember some events you used to tell me.

you told me that aunt irene is your most lucky daughter you had,

because she received the most love from your mother.

she received almost everything, to the extend your mother doesnt treat everyone equally.

or about the gossips you and your friends had.

i really miss you.

the fact that the future is not so bright,

frightens me more.

i don't know how i'll cope life without you.

because i don't want to lose you.

tell me how to hide all my sadness?

how to appear with smiles everywhere?

i cried. because i really am not willing to let it go.another sad thing.

my fucking results.

17.50 over 100.

where the fuck can i go if i get this for my A levels?

maybe my friends think that i'm doing well in JC,

on the contrary, i'm doing badly.

i see no hope in getting AAA/A,

no hope in getting into the course medicine.

should i go to poly instead?

i really want to travel back to time.

to change my decision.

i'm damn lost.

i really dont know what to do.

to continue or what.

call me a loser or whatever,

a pathetic coward who cannot cope in jc.frolicks! as usual, i'm the whitest.

maybe i should grow tanner.

that way my skin tone looks sexier.

[video can't be uploaded, too big._.]

arcadeeeeeee!

jubeat!

yes i love jubeat haha.

bishibashi also can.

bugis or plaza sing.

anywhere also can!

i not so pro like others la.

cos i don't play it that often too.

and yes. i always say,

start happy, end happy.

i really enjoyed the henderson wave chat with you guys. (yl and nich)

although we were had a small group chat,

but at least i know you people can be relied on.

i feel so glad to have you peeps as friends.

i don't regret going to bmss.

to meet such cool peeps.

because in life,

it's hard to fine true ones ♥

it's hard to really conclude whether i should stay on jc life or move on to poly life.

i've found some friends in jc and they're fun to be with as well.

that's why i'm holding back.

i know i cannot score A for economics,

that's why i've thought of moving on to poly already.

my interest is there, not jc.

tell me what i should do then.

go for my interests? or try to get AAA/A?

nvm.

tanner, sexier, muscles.

willyouletmein?

2011-07-16T21:34:00.000-07:00

i've been wondering.

will you be able to forgive him when his tongue lies through his brain?

you know.

sometimes we tell lies.

white lies, we claim.

but who doesn't?

it's just a matter of fact of the number of times how many times you lie.

the more you lie,

the better you get huh.i'm sorry for the rude reply, but you definitely made me laugh .

i wish i can be happy everyday.

it's like, impossible.

with so much stress added, from school, work, parents, etc

sometimes i just feel like giving up?

but then again i tell myself to persevere because it's just one more year ++

this feeling sucks la.still remember this?

it was more of fun then study.

i still remember the poa lesson on the next day was useless,

because most of us were drained out!

how i wish again,

i can re-live through last year.

in JC, it's so much more competitive.

not forgetting to count in foreigners.

which makes it even more worse, more tough.

i really wish,

just one person from my clique was in my jc.

so that he/she can motivate me.

or just understand me?

because i've to start afresh in here.

start off with no friends, lacking of pre-requisite, blah blah.

i'm like disadvantaged ..

like for example,

they say no background of add math cannot take H2 maths.

that's for most of the jc la.

but thankfully jjc allows emath of A2 and above,

and proven me a chance to prove that,

even people who took ACCOUNTS,

can score for H2 math.

i feel like i'm representing 4F`10 .

the rest here are from so much better schools.

needless to say that they score better than me.and i did badly for common test.

how am i suppose to face the world.

it's like crossing a zebra-crossing stupidly when there's a car speeding.

i failed chem and bio, obviously because i didn't study.

but for economics.

no matter how hard i try to write an essay- no application, wrong concept, etc

i really hate this subject

I.FUCKING.HATE.ECONOMICS

but i HAVE to score for it, because it's a H2

i really hate those people who enjoys economics.

because i don't .

i think it's stupid.

although they say it's the most relevant subject to our future lives.

but I GOT NO INTEREST.

you know why i took economics?

because i didn't take pure science, so i CANNOT take 2 H2 science,

so the choices left all contained H2 economics.

and i fucking got only 1 subject combination to choose.

so in a sense i was being forced to take.

but if i didn't take this choice, i have to go to poly .

i never said i look down on poly,

is because i want to go into university at ease.well whatever,

i've been absent from school for a couple of days already.

it's not because i deliberately pon school.

it's because i wake up late.

you may think it's an excuse. suit yourself.

you don't understand anything right. so i don't blame you

anyway, enough talk of academics.

i'll just scrape through EOY i guess?

if i ever retain, then i'll MIA during the holidays,

because i seriously need to consider about continuing jc or not.

woah enough of the sad stuffs.

i dislike feeling sad ):

but it's life.

so.. let's enjoy life !

talk about enjoying life,

i remember my mt oral conversation topic was about shortcut to fame, for eg students want to be popular overnight.

imagine if i could sing/compose songs.

living life with what you enjoy doing.

wouldn't that be awesome?

but life isn't all about that.

in society it's all about your background, your grades.

to some extent this is good, but what about our interests?

aren't we suppose to live with freedom?

some people force themselves to like their job, because of the pay.

why not think about it,

someone wants to be a lawyer just because it's a good-paying job.

what about his interest? maybe it was to become a designer?

but because of the future aspects of that path he chose to abandon his dream?

i think it's stupid. dumb. like hello?

go for your interest can? there's no obligation in singapore.

i know my path of life.

but it's just a matter of fact whether i can get there or not.

because the journey will be tough.

and sometimes i feel lonely.

so lonely .

all i wish for is someone, at least one person, to understand me.

cheers to all those who,

are struggling with life,

trying to cope with stress,

and loneliness.

because i feel you as well.

enjoy your life even if you're feeling down down down.

because we can choose to live happily, or sadly,

it's all about our decision,

on how we see life is.

i've chosen to live life happily.

because i want no regrets

anymore.

schooldom

2011-07-11T06:23:00.000-07:00

YES.

back to school starts. and that yes wasn't for school, i wasn't anticipating school though ..

well anyways, so much happened since the last time i blogged!

i can't possibly remember all of it right?!

hahaha, shall start with the usual- photos !testing new app! instagram/pudding camera ! it has many cool shots and can do wonders! lol.

well, since having an iphone, how could you not have any good camera apps?

like camera+, etc. but those are for jailbreak users, or you can say, apple hardcore fans who are willing to pay for the app.

well for non-jailbroken iphone users like me, we still can find many new and awesome apps for FREE !

so worry not. and start taking photos! anytime, anywhere. even yourself .

these photos are from pudding camera! effects damn nice right! haha. depends on the angle of how you shoot and everything also actually affects the photo.

i'm not making any advertisements or anything, i'm just sharing apps that i think is worth to download and YOU shouldn't miss !some random stuffs and work i had to do . well i was bored so i took photo.

anyways. time to share jc life.

remember how much i whined about wanting to go RP to attend biomedical course?

well i've thought through it.

and given much consideration.

since i've chosen my path of entering JC,

i might as well just perform my best right.

making no regrets would definitely be the best of all choices.

so if i ever get to retain,

so be it. i won't move to poly anymore.

in JC, i know some classmates. some are playful. and sometimes childish? yes IAN i talking about you.

well but it's their characteristics so i can't do much.

as long as my class make me feel that i'm wanted,

that's all i'm wishing for.

EXPECT HIGH = HIGH DISAPPOINTMENT .and yes. designed by lady gaga's shirt. in aid of helping Japan from that disaster.

yes i repeat my point.

if you don't like lady gaga,

don't tell it in front of me.

because it only shows your IQ level .

i don't hate / look down on any artist,

and you can hate her for all you want.

but it isn't my problem and i DON'T WANT to know . so please shut it.

and if you want to insult her in front of me, i also can't say anything.

but there again it shows how clever you really are.

you can curse her till the world ends,

but i don't care .

YOU have your own favourite artist, i didn't say anything negative about them

and who do you think you are to comment on others?

then again, i can't do anything because it's your mouth.

so please, REPENT on your own.

tadaa ! yanlin's belated birthday cake! salmon sashimi cake!

hope you like it ^-^

although there were some flaws, like the rice too hard, but hope you don't mind ah@

stay happy forever la kk!

today's more of a photo post i guess?

little bit of rant here and there, sometimes blogger manages it well.

because i can just throw all my feelings and nag in blogger but it doesn't mind ^^

and i'm starting to appreciate jc life.

really. jurong jc-> rejects jc HAHAHAHA.

but at least i know of some nice people already there.

really, it's easy to tell who's real and fake.

I.HAVE.EYES

but oh well. at least i know of some real people:D and i really enjoy hanging out with them in school LOL . shall meet them out during hols ah ! show my appreciation.oh and my new wallet! love it :D

slim, sexy, sleek, awesome, sexy max :D HAHA .

carrying it makes me feel #likeaboss LOL.

and it's environmental friendly! of course i'm part of being one of them :D

oh and some random things,

i really wanna go overseas do cip ):

watch the tv the show just now the kids damn kelian la.

although i poor enough, but they more poor leh.

you know what?

a 17 y/o boy's wish is to see whether the great wall of china is real or not.

so innocent right.

how i wish i can do my part by helping them...needless to say. thats me ! if you were wondering what i'm holding, its melon yoghurt soda from daiso !

it tastes like melon soda, just that a little of the feeling like you drink yakult and it remains in your throat ..

i love this camera effect ! but it adjusts automatically so i can't really choose which part of the photo i want it to be shown !

anyways, shall stop blogging today!

start happy, end happy :D

and i'm beginning to realise that pool is my new hobby !

because playing pool really helps me distance myself away from academics and worries!

AWESOME POOL TIMES AT MOUNT FABER SAFRA :D

chaleyyyyyyyy !

2011-06-22T03:55:00.000-07:00

yupp, as i promised.

this post will be all about clique chalet that took place from 6-9june !

a brief introduction :

organiser ME

peeps nicholas , xuewen , yanlin , evan , weehaw

so little people right .

because others either not holiday yet, or not able to make it ):

but nevertheless, it was a successful one :D

BUT

sad to say, i took little pictures ):yupp . when we checked in,

we had a little problem .

due to the fact no one was 18,

this auntie gl us lor ):

say by right cannot let us book in .

ite, she allowed us to do so.

"NO SMOKING, NO DRINKING, NO HANKY-PANKY AH"

sadly speaking my face got so gl one meh .

whatever, at least we got to book in !

wait till next year officially 18 then don't needa face such crap anymore (:

ah yes ,

thats evan btw .

and yanlin the maid ah ,

cleaning the pots and pans with mamalemon hahaha

and yes,

the chalet STINKED .

according to nicholas's pro nose,

he said the chalet smelled like Indians stayed before us ..

the room, esp, stinks badly !

it smelt like urine =.=

luckily we bought air fresheners !

SPRAY SPRAY SPRAY, SECOND DAY USE FINISH LIAO SIA.

eehhehe .haha 2 more pretteh people coming through !

jealous?

cos i have so many pretteh friends ^-^ HAHAHA .

off to continue on what happened !

6th June
we arrived and checked in at around 5plus .

yupp spent some time cleaning up .

weehaw was arriving at around8 plus, so we decided to go over to whitesands to meet him and get dinner there .

ate subway , got student meal !

bought some stuffs and headed back .

during the first night, we had nothing much to do i guess .

because we brought laptops !

and too less peeps ):

so we indulged ourselves into our own worlds .

after that, sleep time @ 4am .

we were all ready to turn in . until .

ya . he did a cover of the song .

yanlin la , suggest that song .

YOU'RE MY IDOL . I CANNOT SING SO HIGH NOTES T_T

LMFAO out during that point of time . it was amazingly awesome . HEHEHE

after that, he went on to lend my earpiece and played some game or do his stuffs .

then we went to sleep (: - K.O photo credits - nicholas

took my sexy legs while i was sleeping,

and took evan even sexier legs while he wasn't looking.

IT WAS DAMN COLD CAN, see ,

i slept with the blanket on,

then now without the blanket.

must be evan snatch the whole blanket for himself la.

no wonder i was like freezing -_-
7th June

woke up at around 2plus in the afternoon i guess?

and i thought it was 8am LOL.

yes so troublesome, need to go over to get lunch .

oh ya and xuewen left us last night ):

cos she going to china holiday !

anyway we headed over to SAKAE !

hehehehhe

sakae buffet at 3pm .

yupp !

they spammed order all the possible things we can eat :Dhere's an evidence ! HAHA IN YOUR FACE IAN .

and photo credits - nicholas again :/

yupppp . eat eat eat and eat .

cos it's a buffet, dont eat = stupis people .

and we had one red and pink plate :D

my red plate wasSALMON SASHIMI !

but this cannot be compared to the o-toro sashimi at Tampopo ):

SERIOUSLY MELT IN YOUR MOUTH !

hahahha , sad nicholas don't like sashimi, if not got free goody for him :l

after eating, we went around , and nothing else . headed back ):

not sure what we did back there .

i think we played some bluff .

hahaha . going back was kind of boring thoughhhhh .

actually planned KBOX, but went buffet instead,

so we pushed forward to tml !

BED TIME.

seriously,

they nothing to do ah. so high for what .

BLANKET SNATCHING LOL .

and pillow snatching also .

then evan at there bo chup .

me & weehaw VS yanlin & nicholas .

ite ?

we managed to get a pillow .

they got blanket .

AND THIS EVAN HAPPY AH GOT PILLOW AND BLANKET .

at there act emo only, dont want to move .

THEN NICHOLAS ACCIDENTELY STEP EVAN LEG LOLLL

emo ah .
8th June

woke up at around 11-12 ? i not very sure also .

then planned to go KBOX.

so when everybody was awake, we headed down to tampinese .

then GOT PROBLEM .

tampinese de kbox close liao .

wah then we head to downtowneast the ehub lor .

go there, around 5 plus already .

also not enough time to sing lor ):

ahhhh bad day it was .

then we go ntuc bought some stuffs .

and headed back .

yanlin was leaving today,

she told me already from the start ,

then weehaw accompany her back .

so actually plan was,

left me evan and nicholas .

then dont know why this chin bye

leave with them also .

BOBIAN , CHINBYE IS A CHINBAI .amazingly cheap and enormous serving of nerds !

can be found at value shop at whitesands located at pasir ris .

and so, left me and evan at chalet .

nothing much to do lor .

i started to pack things up .. then played lappy LOL

i didn't sleep at all . cos i planned to go back home to bathe and sleep !

so it was morning already, and i didn;t notice also ! hahaha .

at roughly 8.30

we were ready to leave !

so we went down to get the people in the office to help us check out .

stupid sia say 8.30am open .

we waiting till 9/9.30 am then they were there .

and so .. HOME !

sat bus 5 ALL THE WAY TO BM INT LOL INSANITY .

but i suggested it HAHAHAHHAHA .

yupp home-ed .

SLEPT !

and that's it for chalet !

seriously, it could be more fun if more people attended ):

oh and no alcohol was consumed in this chalet (:

ACHIEVEMENT ! HAHAHAH

#randomfact10: i'm looking forward to life once i hit 18 !

awesome

2011-06-12T03:39:00.000-07:00

JUNE HOLIDAYS !

and i'll try my best to recount all the past events that took place !

i remember it was on 29 may, when it was a sunday

that me and evan went to suntec city convention hall, not to have sex,

but i initiated that we make a trip down there cos there's the asiasoft company there!

and yeah, i bought the 30k cash just to get the free mousepad and keychain LOL .

and the fucking girl stole my top prize, alienware laptop D:

dinner at biefu @ tiong !

yes, look at the amount of chicken they serve !

at first i thought it was like 3 pieces of chicken , san ge yi kuai de ji .

oh yeah. and there was the malaysia company there too, promoting their games .

XDO haha, reminds me of O2jam can !

thats why i played it :p

and signed up on the spot !

they give lot's of rubbish though ..

got posters, free CD installer , and that's it i guess ...

so kind right, help them sign in, fill up their paper !yeah. and there was this card, we had to go around to various stations to get a chop, must either sign up things or play games.

super easy ! hahaha . complete liao got a chance to lucky draw .

evan sadly got an inflatable .

and i got the 6th anniversary cash weapon .

happy me ^-^and the 6th anniversary overall they give for free, shoes and hat we missed T_T cos the event was ongoing for 3 days and we managed to only go on the last day ~_~yeah, and it was hot.

so i used the coupons to fan myself .

somehow, this despo kid saw it.

then he shared his agony with us, cos the unstoppable star can get from queueing up at some party they have, but only first 300 gets it. and sadly he didnt make it in time, the same as us D:

and so, he was despo .

he keep begging me to sell him the star .

i was considering ..

then he offered : $2 .

in my mind i was : $2 , are you fucking kidding me ? LOL

then i just said no, and walked away HAHAHAHA . #likeaboss the next day.

had a great dinner :D

@ABC market. as usual lolllll.

this one nth much to talk about la, food only . lol .yeahhhh !

the next thing that happened was 4F`10 CLASS OUTING !

remember him?

shut up ian i not talking to you. LOL

photos can be found here ->http://www.facebook.com/media/set/?set=a.1752959267726.2089680.1351238921

upcoming post will be about chalet !

and i feel guilty about one thing :/

that i promised to help out for D&T but i overslept cos i really was sleep deprived on that day ...

and 2 more weeks of holidays !

it's to study and not play anymore ):

back to school life i guess ..

#randomfact9: i can be lazy to the extend of pangseh-ing people :o

oopsididntdoitonpurpose.

2011-05-22T03:14:00.000-07:00

yooooo !

it's been 2 weeks since i've blogged . heheh .

paiseh last week went out during the weekends, totally forgot about blogging !

welllll since i didn't blog for 2 weeks, today's blogpost will be a long one :D

well idk how to make it long luh but let's start with some pictures .

hahaha this is totally random, but this is the "box" i made,

keeping memories of 4F`2010

yes i wasn't close with everyone,

but at least i've made some true friends there (:

and obviously this is where i keep my stuffs .

personal stuffssssss !
urghh . and i was bored that day,

so i went on to put different shoelaces on my shoe .

i guess wearing like this to school would be awkward right?

BUT I LIKE !

anyway i took it out cos it really would seem weird to wear it to school like that.

indecisive .

yeah, how my life was last week .

i rmb i totally didn't had the motivation to go to school last week .

why?

idk as well.

just didnt had the mood to attend school .

fml, ttm .
bright and enormous red apple!

thinking of snow white right, eat apple then sleep LOL .

nah i took a pic of this cos it was abnormally big .

and it was damn sweet !

all the vitamins and stuffs :D no sugar ! haha

i must say,

last week i had a great life LOL .

i only attended school on monday and friday .

tuesday was vesak , wed & thurs sick .

oh this reminded me .

if you're sick, stay at home can .

don't come to school and pass the disease to others la .

tmd sia, i monday go so healthy one .

reach home felt sick wtf .

power la .

made me waste $$ go doc,

heng my mum go with me ah :D means FOC .oh the cute sandwiches i took from outside Mr.Curry @ the central hahaha .

sho kyute . LOL

i still remember that day, we ( nich and me ) waited for yl and mary at outside, then he bring laptop wtf ?

then play awhile , they very long leh wtf .

finally end work then wt also came lol .

then we went to eat STEAMBOAT ! at chinatown there.

$17 i think !

walao wt keep eat the pig liver and kidney LOL .

make the soup base got the blood taste ):

but is got 2 soup base la, tomyum and chicken .

spam like no tml sia ! wtf . lolol .

yeah ate steamboat damn full !

cab home :D i was the first hahahahha .

yes i love buffets !

GOT BUFFET = GOT ME :D
oh yeah , tian pin dian !

green tea with red bean snow ice :D

nice !

yeah it was eaten by me on the day before mothers' day !

went to find yl ma that day, then pass her the umeshu .

then dono why end up at tiong also LOL forget le paiseh .

okay i shall share smth with you all here,

it's located at tiong basement 1 ...

SECRET AH LOL .

oh yeah, personally,

i'm a GaGa fan can .

sorry lo,

diff ppl got diff idols right .

yours is some kpop or china,

mine is gaga ok .

insult her lo,

cos you don't have her talent HAHA .jealousy kills ):

OMG THIS SO RANDOM LOL .
HAHA !

this is my progress report one . LOL .

General Paper

Math

Biology

Chinese

Chemistry

Economics .

there, my results . power hor ?

i thought i will fail alot wor . ite failed econs . ):

nevermind .

this is only 10% of overall marks !

come one la,

i'm already in holiday mood now T_T

holiday-deprived LOL .

and yes, i really mean it .

this coming friday isn't a good one either . tmd .

cos GP common test ends on 6PM

and i got cca investiture till dont know what time .

MEANS

i cannot go buy my stuffs on friday,

only on saturday !

OH SPEAKING OF SATURDAY.

asiasoft at suntec !

I WANT BUY THE DUALBLADER PPC GET THE KEYCHAIN LOL .

TYPICAL SINGAPOREAN PAISEH .

SOMEONE PLEASE GO WITH ME ON SATURDAY PLEASE T__T AHHAHA .lemeleme app on iphone !

yeapp this was my medicine for last week,

for flu and cough nia .

stupid doc,

say if feel unwell please come back tml

WANT EARN ME $$ ONLY HAR . FAT HOPE .

my mum went with me, she also visited the doc,

total was $77 . wtf . damn exp can .

speaking of iphones,

I WANT THE WHITE ONE DAMN IT .

i didn't know they were going to release the white one, i thought only iphone5

so i skipped waiting for iphone 5.

who the fuck knows,

the apple guy suddenly happy go release white iphone 4.

NOW I'M DAMN JEALOUS OF THOSE WHO GOT WHITE ONE .

fuck ,

tmd !

i'm so gonna ask if can change for a white one or not,

even if i have to pay for it or not .

COS THE WHITE ONE IS SEXY .

yeah, i like fashion too you know LOL .hahaha my school suddenly got kittens !

damn cute .

see > it's so small .

got like 4-5 kittens .

i was returning my plate, then i saw my classmate squatting there .

i go over then i saw her playing with the kittens .

siao ah ?!

LOL .

she likes kittens , so obvious duh .

ya, this was taken only on friday heheh .

friday sucked i tell you . (last friday)

wasn't suppose to have PW lecture .

so i predicted i end at 1230 .

then yue hao with nich felicia xw evan go sakae eat .

tmd . then i on that day, rmb got bio test, so tell them i end at 230 like that .

ok lor . in the morning ma, then they say ok .

evan sudden cmi say 330 end .

then i suddenly know i got PW lecture . WTF ?

so i end school at 330 lo like that . i wanted to pon,

then,

I GOT GP TEST WTF .

430-530 wtf la .

cos i absent so had to take .

fuck,

so sakae was cancelled .

instead want pool . so told them pool lo .

then i fin late got delayed,

i 645 reach home .

felicia and xw 7+ need go off le ,

so i say i go over also awhile only so might as well don't go .

then that's it for my friday .

TOTALLY SCREWED . traditional dinner (:

simple and plain . with soup . HAHAHA .

yes this was my dinner yesterday !

at yl house :D

went to her house cos she jio me go ma,

then felicia there also,

felicia taught her physics and addmath ,

while i was doing my chem .

dinner at her house,

damn full .

the soup damn nice :D sweet one .

no use WEI JIN WOR ! hahaha .

then ask nich come over also .

nich sadly hacked into yl acc when we were eating . LOL .

then aft that we went to play pool .

omg i so noob in pool ): i dont like .

then aft that we went to commonwealth to sheng siong, find ts and wh LOL so random !

find them liao we go BACK to pool again wtf ?

wh so pro T_T

at least he taught me some skills ytd :D

yayayayness .

pro pro pro pro pro . LOL .

yeah ytd i reached home ard 2.45 am

so early .

mum nagged at me ):

why my sis and bro come back so late you no nag .

i know you worried, i asked you to sleep first, you stubborn want wait for me .

hais ):

yes i admitted i was angry ytd,

but overall i understand you :Dhere's a super random pic .

see that orange thing ?

IT'S MY BUNNY . MUAHAHAHA .

holidays are coming :D

i'm so looking forward to : CHALET :D

yes i'm so going to PARTEH ALL DAY 24/7 DURING JUNE LOL .

no la, need study also . fml .

cos aft june is my common tests , 30% of my overall results .

sometimes,

school / studies are just party-poopers . just spoils the mood .

i hope i will have the mood to study yo LOL .

yeah ,

i hope i don't get those results again D:

i even thought of going to POLY NOW WTF .

what am i thinking of ?!

why didn't i do enough research last time ?

biomedical science in RP interests me so much .

so fucking much .

SP NP rejected me , i should have chosen RP.

fml .

if i went to RP i sure damn interested can .

ALL THE THINGS THERE SO INTERESTING URGHH ZXC .

nvm . go jc also bu cuo ah .

get 4 A can go in UNI MEDICINE .

say until so easy like that LOL .

yeah my aspiration is to go that course . jiayou !

wooooow ! such a long post today,

FELT GREAT :D

BLOGGER MAKES ME FEEL HAPPY LOL .

#randomfact8: i like to parteh and feel high sometimes . HAHAHA

2011-05-07T02:27:00.000-07:00

non-photo post ! (that's taken by me)

cos idwanna sync my phone with the com,

as the stupid contacts will sync and blah blah blah .

i wanted to untick the contacts thingy but forget,

and now i dont know how to set :/

so i shall not take the risk again ! LOL .

urghhh . today is DAMN HOT .

well . let's share the joy from the other days !

yesterday-friday .

did cip in the morning (:

totally worth it ! seeing the smiles on their faces .

hahahah .

what we did?

simple .

just chatting with them,

playing games with them,

and perform for them,

and helping to either feed or clear their plates for lunch,

and pushing them back to their rooms to rest .

it's such a simple task,

i don't find it a chore at all :D

after cip,

then went out to JP to find nich and felicia !

they were crazy !

felicia wants to go back BM to pai zhao .

then nich wu yuan wu gu say pai luo zhao .

THEN FELICIA KEEP SAY LUO ZHAO LOL .

so true quotes :D

actually i'm not totally insane like NICHOLAS and YANLIN

after walking around looking for food in jp,

we were fed up :C

because we couldn't find any god damn place to eat when we were HUNGRY .

you know what they say- a hungry person is an angry person -> bisexual version :D LOL

so, thanks to nich the kind soul, he went to look up on his iphone to search on places to makan ! and we found - clementi -> seoul garden .

idk why we were craving for BUFFEIS !

and off we went to clementi ! :D

yeah , i don't hate for no reason .

in fact, it's hard for me to hate someone/something/whatever shit .

so do not assume why i hate it okay , personal reasons .

well guess what?

clementi's seoul garden had no space,

and we had to be on the waiting list for like 1 hour .

like what the fuck .

we were starving and you expect us to wait for 1 hour ?! HELL NO !

then otw down to hunt for other buffeis , there were 2 cute little children, and they were hugging each other OPENLY in the public ..

then nich burst out into laughter, then i heard one of them say : see la got people laughing .

i bet they were like : SHOCKED AND SHY *BLUSH . HAHAHAHA .

so, instead we went to AJISEN RAMEN .

awesome soup base noodle shop :D

well, of course it was EXPENSIVE,

but it's all worth it, although the ala-carte serve lesser than those of at tiong .

before we ordered, there was this thing on the table, like at 18chef, we thought we had to ownself order, but ite it's for THEM to order . wtf . embarassed max .yepp, as i had stated just now, don't assume !

whether or not if it's for a relationship of love, or your normal friends, so on and so forth .

yeah!

after eating ajisen we waited for the arrival of XW !

stupidly, we headed back to tiong . LOL .

as they had the intention of going to play pool but forgetting to tell me - OTL ):

arriving at tiong, bought sweet talk , i bought honeydew SEKO !

went on to play pool !

felicia left early ): aww .

price - Felicia $4 . the rest $8 (estimated price)

expensive la, but had fun :D

too bad i don't own a pool table ): if not can train .. sad life .wah picture so small, but can enlarge and ownself see right ?! LOL .

the picture tells it all .

after pool, we went to yl house .

apparently i was suppose to teach her math .

ite i also forgot about sec sch stuffs and wasn't able to help : hen bao qian ):

after that went down to makan !

ate spicy stuffs ): ): ):

i suffered of cos . hais .

aft that they hyper ah . like on drugs .

go mac then hyper . wtf .

like totally crazy ! CRAZYYYYY .

the trend now is pokemon is it ?! LOL .ya, memories ♥

shall end of the post here :D cos after mac - headed home .

tomorrow is mother's day ..

vexed about what to get ): urgh .

#randomfact7: sometimes i don't understand my moodswings too ):

puttingonafacadeistough):

2011-05-03T04:58:00.001-07:00

heheh my home lock screen photo :D

self-drawn (:

last week was ..

nothing much .

just that i like the fact where wednesday was a holiday :D

cos some shit polling was done in my sch , so no sch !

friday :D

went out ahhhh .

so long nv go out chat liao !

super waste time BUT worth it :DD

had a long chat with yl and nich , crapping and all the random stuffs !

PIZZA ! for dinner on one of the days ! forgot which le la .__.

the first one is so much more nicer than the 2nd one lo .

stupid black things .

NOT LIZARD / COCKROACH SHIT AH .

nowadays, i'm only looking forward to weekends ..

i'm so tired of going to school back and forth everyday .

damn .

it's only been like 3 months and i'm starting to feel tired alr?

traveling alone for 2 whole years will be a torture to me though D:

hahahah the crayfish hor fun at block 65 :D

super nice can :DDD

woohoo !

if i didnt remember wrongly ..

thursday played pool !

i suck at pool la T__T

someone coach me pleaseeeeeee .

oh and i got this sudden urge to learn some self defense skill :o

SOMEONE PEI ME GO LEARN LEH T__T

not forgetting the meatballs ! and garlic bread ..

although nice,

but eat after awhile will ni liao .

IKEA's meatballs are still the best i've ever tasted !

jap curry !

mum cooked :D

not so pro la, use the paste thingy to cook ..

but tasted almost like Mr.Curry one sia ..

but this one not spicy ! :D

tml is napha .

tmd . 2.4 i guess . hope i'll pass zzz .

today moodless to study / do whatever shit .

fuck this mood :/

friday - no school cos polling day in my school , instead got CCA .

monday - no school ^-^

hence, got 4 days of break ! whatever . so short zz .

-rant time-

last week was alright ..

lessons lectures tutorials all i was lost ?

sucks .

maybe cos i didnt revise or something ..?

i just hope my mood will come back ASAP .__.

urghh .

then weekends so early end .

tmd .

dont have the schooling mood now la .__. zz

-ends of rant time-

LOL TODAY SO SHORT :D

so in conclusion :

i've got no mood for school nowadays .

psps i forgot what i wanted to blog about zzz .

too bad .

#randomfact6: sometimes to me, friends > homework (:

whybother?

2011-04-21T07:08:00.000-07:00

i guess,

"why bother" wins all the time .

i should just ignore them .

HEHEH HAHA .

as in . those sore losers .

can't stand them though .

GOOD FRIDAY !

extra holiday for us . haha .

even though it's a holiday,

i don't see the point why it is one :o

some random drawing i did about my first impression of my teachers .. haha .

aw my bio teacher change . and now no more Mr. Er ):

his life philosophies are so damn interesting leh ..

now change to a female teacher, who came back from maternity leave.

she damn skinny leh . see her figure also very hard believe she give birth lor .__.

yes starhub . NOT singtel .

my parents was intending to get singtel, but cos of past payments which my parents owed la, they don't allow.

and expect them to pay $500 deposit. LOL

with $500, my dad took starhub plan, WITH getting a new phone ! SMART HAHA !

hahaha. but still nvm. i got my student plan xD

well obviously got new number . duh .

ask me nicely i'll give it to you :D

look ! black/grey patches at the backspace and one more button .

HAHA SO COOL .

at first, iphone cannot hear, send go the bloody place .

then get NEW one.

come home,

on also cannot on even after charging for 8 hours +

then i tried dont know how many times then can on .

when on the screen like got bug like that, dont know how to say also .

and . obviously this phone is a re-con one;

means people use before, spoil they send go the place, then they repair it and give others use .

my mum went back there again, then they GUAILAN can .

say the buttons loose also won't affect the phone .

they fixed the grey parts but then REFUSE to change a new one .

my mum said she lazy to argue further D:

IF I THERE,

I SURE WILL CONTINUE ONE .

PAYING SO MUCH TO GET A SECOND HAND PHONE?

WTF IS THIS .

haha posted this before,

BUT I FEEL LIKE DRINKING ONE NAOOOOOOOO .

someone be a kind KIND soul and buy for me please ):

kind no need to be holy ah .

HAHAHA .

shit i think i'm starting to hate christians more and more ):

hais . sry ah, bad impression , bobian .

EHH SERIOUSLY I NO MORE PHOTOS TO POST, NVM I TRY FINDING OLD ONES :D

WOOHOO MY NEW BED !

HAPPY SIA .

LMAO NO LA,

smart people can see the IKEA price tag there LOL .

but if really my bed ah

I EVERY MORNING CANT WAKE UP GO SCHOOL LIAO HEHEHEHE

but really look cosy can ):

you know why i no photos to post?

cos i stayed at home for this "long" weekend -__-

what a great way to spend holidays , NOT .

HAHAHA I STALK PPL

LOL JK .

some random photos i used for DNT last year (:

guess where this? lol . obvious though :x

woah i seriously like this design ! IMBA MAX .

do homework, easily can charge handphone too . WOOHOO !

design damn cool, but producing it will be another issue ):

hehe designer's life ah . hahaha . damn good right? designing products which are convinient for us to use !

but then someone told me that in design course, she in design course, GUESS WHO LOL

the lecturer say design nice but useless is considered a design ..

HOW CAN THAT BE?

we design something so that it would be of use right !

not design just for the sake of designing .

urghh . NVM .

WOOHOO my design specs for DNT last year !

why so many dnt things?

cos i no other photos -_-

heheheh so meaningful right my product?! LOL .

WOOHOO HAPPY ME ! just like how happy i am now !

although i'm not satisfied with life, but i AM happy for the fact that i have awesome friends now !

friends who brought me happiness heheh .

i dare say that sometimes i feel pissed off with you guys,

but it's because of those that made me feel that you guys are my friends who treat me so close to the extent OF CALLING ME FAT LOL .

WOOHOO . HAPPY YAY .

and i will not care about those fake ones :D

out to ruin my happiness only!

#randomfact5: i don't regret taking D&T ! neither will i forget that amazing experience (:

feel.

2011-04-19T05:53:00.000-07:00

to some extent i gotta agree to what nich's point of view towards religions .

which you mean ?

http://nerdybaka.blogspot.com/2010/08/anorexia-totally-pwned-man.html

i hope you don't mind ah :p

and yes i do believe in karma, and i say it's all based on luck !

that's why i say i believe in both LOL .

and what's more .

from MY point of view .

i find it scary, that people can be brainwashed, to believing something .

AGAIN I WANT LIFT FROM NICH BLOG ! ps ah :p

"If you wanna believe in something which others don't believe in,

be prepared to hear things you don't like to hear ".

yepp . so true ! NICH YOU CAN BE PHILOSOPHER LIAO LA .

too bad, i don't believe such stuff .

it's all mere luck right .

why do we care HOW the world was made in the first place,

HOW humans existed in the first place .

can't we just live in the PRESENT ?

not in the PAST ?

it's like .

someone who we don't know of their existence,

and you go all out to pray for them .

.......

sad life ah,

my class alot christians ):

see this post maybe they'll hate me more .

BUT I DON'T CARE. COS I'M ME ,

IT'S ALL ABOUT ME . LOL .

ya i can be selfish , self-centered . why do you care so much anyway .

i'm just living my life .

friends?

what are they to you?

to me; they are willing to spend time with me . waste some of their hours of life with me . etc .

and yeah.

i did mentioned i believe in karma;

that's why i don't do bad things right ?!

anyway, it is to some extent of the same meaning of retribution .

talking about that, i also believe in retributions .

so even if you exploit me, i'll just wait for that day of your agony to come .

maybe that's why some ppl hate others to the extent of killing them .

it's NOT that easy to forgive and forget you know ):

i also wished that my memories enabled me to delete unhappiness out of my life immediately.

well. joking around is always accepted (:

but too overboard then not la .__.

and please,

making people spend $$ on you for no reason .

i will do that,

if i'm close enough to you .

and, the fact that i didn't agree made it worse.

YOU ALL ASSUMED IT .

get a fucking life .

giving me a load of bullshit when you lost the debate?

why do you need so much pride?

wan bu qi ah . LOL . sore loser ? LMAO . don't start anything in the first place then .

on the surface,

i appear stingy .

when i get to know you very closely,

$$ issue is not a problem.

and sometimes , RARELY LA LOL, i treat people one ok ! HAHAHA .

oh yeah, do unto others what you want others to do unto you.

treat me naise and like a friend AND I'LL ADORE YOU TO DEATH OK HEHE .

seriously, please fucking leave me alone

if you're not those who are willing to sacrifice some time with me .

and i'll leave you alone too (:

since you started with this attitude game,

i shall show you attitude too :o

yi ya huan ya ! WOOHOO CHENG YU !

depressed?

2011-04-16T06:54:00.000-07:00

heyyoooooo . thanks bloggers for reading my blog :D

especially random people who tagged at my chatbox LOL .

appreciate all of your visits (:

they make me feel that my blog is NEEDED haha !

as stated in my title : depressed .

obviously my mood for this week :\

see ? L1 - 2

means level 1, 2 marks .

i got this mark for like both econs practice test :\

and yet i tell everyone econs is commonsensical ..

such irony huh .

Mr. Ang, our econs teacher, is a nice teacher .

but i just can't bring myself to start loving econs ..

my FIRST impression of econs, EVEN BEFORE TAKING THE SUBJECT,

was : such a sian subject . i cfm not taking it .

gah . i wished i could've took other subjects .. oh well , life isn't as expected .

a timeplan which our GP teacher asked us to plan . i hope i can follow it LOL ,

i doubt so .

firstly, i'm not interested .

secondly, i'm lazy .

and the list of excuses goes on .

well maybe you'll think " why give so much excuse, read nia, got so hard meh"

and if you're really thinking about that,

i'll answer you with :

mind your own business (:

talk about the happy things that can be presented in life ! LOL

gong cha is one of them ! the milk tea really nice leh .

altho i drink awhile start to feel ni about it, but personally, i think it's better than koi .

oh ya and i'm starting to avoid pearls ! cos i'm starting to hate it lol .

DAJIEDA . lolol . making a call to ask ppl whack me T_T LMAO .

and guess her phone ! xD

it's blackberry's sibling :o

BLUEBERRY ! hahahahhaha . looks like blackberry right ?!

in fact when i first saw it i thought so too .

but upon seeing it closer,

i noticed it wasn't ...

instead it's some samsung mobile ..

look at the awesome jap food ! i find it quite ok, but ....

my mum says it's not very good .

she says her canteen one much better, and quantity more .

that's what she gets for patronising that jap store in her canteen ba ?

just like in life, how we get treated really depends on some factors .

maybe you'll think differently from me,

but i shall give some examples :

-my mood

-how you treated me

-my impression of you

-our relation

etc etc.

great. i sound like i very dua pai like that .

i admit i'm not,

but those are just how i feel ok ._.

HAHA PARANOID ME LOL .

ahh so adorable !

idk when this was taken, found randomly on my phone LOL .

well these are small ..

imagine HUGE STUFFED TOYS LIKE THEM THAT YOU CAN HUG OMG

hug till death i also want LOL .

just like my orange bunny ^-^

oops i haven't take photo yet, i keep forgetting :x

okok i will take when i remember k ? :D

this is what happens to your paper when you meet new-crazy-random friends ..

LOL . when i saw this,

i was like : wth is this .

then he told me : is shoot like a boss .

me : no link leh ..

he : got gun what so is shoot la .

LOL x2 .oh yeah . a ju hua cha + 2 grape mogumogu .

drank by ONE PERSON ,

can be done in less than 5 mins .

IMBA RIGHT LOL LOL LOL .

how i wish i had his talent too :C

ahahah . roasted chickennnnnnn with potatoes !

it's naise !

as in . NICE .

i asked my mum 2 times where she bought it, and i still can forget LOL . sry ah STM ,

bo bian ah .

hmmmm seems like i no more pics to add le :o

kay moving on to happy things that had been done !

went to MINDS - my beneficiary visit place for this year .

help them out. my group went to unit 4.

the most lowest IQ .

then we walk with them around the place .

ya, and they were like happy ....

cos they don't get to do that often..

but i felt happy cos i helped them .

ONE DAY I SHALL BREAK OPEN THE BARRIER BETWEEN US OK ! WOOHOO .

ok moving on to the happy things that can be done !

next week, friday-sunday .

anyone wanna jio me out ?!

do anything also can pls jio me .

like pool, supper, etc ! i don't wanna feel bored ):

random picture for the weeeeeeeek !

0h the overnighting D&T moments :p

such experiences were sometimes awful, cos felt tooo tired for sch the next day, but still,

it's worth it :D

oh and guess who's product is that ?! didn't mean to show but it just happened to be there :x

and i still rmb this was at CIA2 hahahaha .

#randomfact4: i guess i don't have the courage for love :\

expensivedays.

2011-04-10T07:04:00.000-07:00

this week was a blast :D

okay, mon-wed nothing much happen though . so i shall start with thursdays !

thursday, was felicia's birthday :DDD

went to celebrate it by going to crystal jade dinner buffet :D WOOHOO .

although we(yl irene and me) arrived late, it was NICE , good food woohoooooo .

esp free flow of XIAO LONG BAO LOL . and spammed alot of beef YAY .

super full kk ! but if only we reach earlier :\

and felicia's taiwan trip ):

well . if what nich said was right, that her taiwan was at commonwealth,

then i feel that.

what's there to hide ? if really can't make it just tell us the truth ?? why must cover it up ?! okay thats what i feel if you're really lying alright . although i don't hate you, but you just lied to us ):

after buffet we went to bu ji shi to walk walk !

yl bought her ring, xw bought her $10 bag, irene bought for felicia a dress, felicia bought a watch, anyone and anything i missed out ?!

haha although i wanted to buy stuffs, ite i didn't buy anything ): shy me !

and before went home we went arcade

no video cos idk how upload from iphone ):

okay end of thursday, went home early due to school the next day ): sucks ttm .

but it was alright, friday i ended at 12.30 WOOHOO . cos pw lecture cancelled . then nich pei me go vivo to buy the AWESOME HUGE(not very big but still considered large) RABBIT LOL .

will post it's picture next post :DD cos i didnt take it yet ! ORANGE COLOUR MUAHAHHA .

ohya during bus ride to vivo, nich found a earpiece, white colour one, but spoil liao SAD LOL . so good right, FOC earpiece !

then aft that went to Mr.Curry @ Central, visit ahling and maryyyyyyyy .

they there work so slack lor ! and also quite fun like that , even boss also not so strict one, can play play , maybe they girls la thats why like that .__.

the cute lil' ramens displaying outside Mr. Curry @ Central (:

4 diff curries to choose from ! Mr.Curry, Spicy, Creamy, Seafood !

SECRET RECIPE ! STEAL WAHAHAHA .

looks so tempting right ?! ): *drools

THE CUTE OCTOPUS LOL.

LOOKS SO TEMPTING :@ I WANT EAT NAOOOOOOOOOOOOO .

some act cute parfait :\

the awesome setting ! looks damn nice right ! NICE & COSY FEELING (:

awesome scallop ! ok la not bad nia . LOL

CURRIES ! 4 diff type wahaha .

WanTing -> Spicy

Evan -> Mr. Curry

Nich -> Creamy

Me -> SEAFOOD :D

the black one is seafood btw .

black cos its full of squid's ink ! NOT SEA ANIMAL'S SHIT .

while they working, we (evan me nich wt) went to settler's cafe !

nice cafe ! nice service too, teach us how play games hahaha . played board games la .

games : TABOO , JENGA, SOME WEIRD BUT FUN CARD GAMES ETC . wanna go there again next time :D

sadly no pics ):

aft that we went supper @ tian tian smth smth rest. LOL . at tiong there. the food can say okok lar, the chicken was okay ): not nicer than the nicest one i ate LOL OK TALKIN CRAP .

NO PICS HERE TOO T__T SADSAD .

oh ya i suddenly rmb the overly sweeeeeeet choc cake i ate . LIKE EATING SUGAR LOL .

sry all i know this post is boring D: i also didn't expect this either !

okay on sat - went p.s play . actually i went to buy my MATTE PROTECTOR for my iphone :D yeah, i got my new iphone !

so cute right?! $40 ): . but i bought the replica @ queensway for $20 LOL .

quality of cos diff la ..

then we went to queensway ! went to buy contact lens .

forgot is nich or irene ask me buy, then i bought ..

shared with irene hehe, each person pay $14 haha .

walao nich pro la, help me one time nia then can wear contact liao.

i have to try multiple times somemore walao . ):

noob jiu shi zhe yang !

okay as seen i will edit this post again some time .

TIME FOR .. RANDOM FACT , nah , RANDOM PIC COMES FIRST :D

oops lazy to rotate it . OBS ♥! I MISS IT CAN . so fun D:

#randomfact3: i always try my best to give in to the situation :\ sucky characteristics .